Yep, guilty as charged. I took an AP writing course in high school and never stopped.
I wouldn't worry too much about rambling, your story is from a scientist's point-of-view, so it kind of fits the character's voice. I really dig the amount of research that obviously went into your work. I've been spending some time researching how the Georgia National Guard operates. I gotta take some artistic liberties (ex. Georgia National Guard didn't deploy to Iraq until after the invasion), but it's good to be grounded in reality.
Thanks, it's supposed to be a scientists view on the beginning of the apocalypse, so much hard science is required, and it probably goes ove… morer some peoples heads sadly. But it does have some pretty sound scientific theory's in it about how zombies could actually exist.
I am also a fan of your work as well : ) your writing seems much more organised than mine, with less ramble in it. I'm guessing you've written quite a lot, keep up the good work.
Manny cursed silently as Doc Horner unwrapped the bandages and started prodding at his injured rib.
"You're a lucky bastard." The large African American man said in his distinctive Alabama drawl.
"Do lucky bastards gets shot twice in the same year?"
"Most folks who lose a fight with a 7.62mm machine gun don't live to tell the tale, let alone get shot again." Manny closed his eyes and tried to drive the image of Cho's bisected corpse out of his head. "Thankfully, your flak jacket took the worst of it. The fact you made it out with a couple of fragments and a fractured rib is a miracle by itself." The doctor looked dejectedly at the dying bite victims at the other side of the tent. "Plus, you uh...didn't end up like them poor souls."
"True enough." Manny conceded. "How's military life treating you, Doc?" He already had a pretty good idea, you could see the exhaustion on the doctor's face.
"Pretty well, all things considered." The large man chuckled miserably. "I'm a family doctor...ain't treated wounds like this since Grenada, and that was oh...21 years ago. Beats the hell outta being food for them crazies though." After a long silence, Doc Horne wrapped a fresh bandage around the wound and started scribbling in his notepad.
"Soooo, I'm cleared for duty?"
"LIGHT duty." The doctor corrected him. "Remember, you lost a lot of blood. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't allow it, but things outside are getting worse all the time and the brass needs everyone they can get. I'll give you some painkillers for the ribs, but our supplies are running low, so otherwise you're on yo-"
"DOC!" A voice called from outside the medical tent. Two men jogged in, carrying a groaning Marine, with his left leg chopped off at the knee. Doc Horner looked at the victim, swore and turned back to Manny.
"Ortiz, the rest of your stuff is in Hangar 2A with your unit, you can show yourself out, god bless." He didn't need to be told twice. Manny got up, grabbed his things and walked into the summer heat. Each step sent a dull ache through his chest, but it felt good to finally be on his feet.
The base was a mad rush of activity. Hundreds of soldiers from all branches of the military and their families set up camp in hangars and tent cities scattered around the Tarmac. Guards were stationed at improvised watchtowers all along the perimeter. In spite of everything, the atmosphere at the base felt oddly cheerful.
"Move it!" A Humvee full of Marines honked and yelled, snapping Manny out of his thoughts. He crossed a runaway and made his way toward the hangar serving as a makeshift barracks for most of Blackhawk Company. On the way there he found Sgt. White speaking with wife, Linda. She was hard to miss with her long platinum blonde hair.
"Jake, dear; look who it is."
"Hey," White beamed, "Didn't expect to see you back on your feet this soon."
"Hey, Manny." Linda chirped "Glad to see you're doing ok." They were an odd couple; Sgt. White towered over Linda, who was barely over five feet tall.
"Thanks!" He smiled back, "I'm glad to see you made it here alright, Linda. Things are getting pretty bad out there."
"Yeah, me too." White added nervously. "It was...a close call, y'know? Good thing my girl knows how to take care of herself." He smiled and gave his wife a quick kiss. "I'll meet you back at the tent in a bit, darling. Gotta show Manny where he's sleeping." She nodded and walked toward the tent city, while Manny and White continued on to the barracks. White was grinning, but the way he was forcing it reminded Manny of a constipated dog. Finally, he dropped the act and started shaking his head.
"She's pregnant." White blurted, once his wife was out of earshot.
"Wha-?" White cut him off
"Yeah, that was kind of my reaction too. Fucking wonderful timing, ain't it?"
"You could say that...what are you two going to do?" White grimaced, clearly unsure of how to answer.
"I don't know, man. This shit ain't blowing over, at least for a long fucking time...how am I supposed to be a Dad knowing that what happened to Cho could happen to me at any given day? Remember what happened to Lt. Marsh back in Nasiriyah? Pretty wife, two kids in pre-school? Then somebody had to tell em' that Daddy got blown up by some fucker with an RPG." He hesitated, staring at the ground. "I don't want her to have to deal with that."
"That's always a risk." Manny said earnestly. "She knew what she signed up for."
"Yeah." White sighed, trying to shake the unpleasant thought from his mind. How about your folks? They make it here?" Manny's throat tightened with worry.
"No, it's eating away at me." He admitted, "I told them to pick up abuela in Macon and head to the base, but...I don't know."
"Try not to worry about it. They'll get here." White said with genuine sympathy.
"I hope so...I treated them like shit the day I left for UGA." The pair finished the rest of their walk to the hangar in silence. They pushed through the large metal building, hastily filled with cots, storage containers and other guardsmen. When the pair reached Manny's bunk, Corporal Gibbs was waiting or them. White's expression changed to an angry glare as he stalked toward the driver, who's blue eyes appraised White nervously.
"What are you doing here, Corporal?" He demanded, placing himself mere inches from Gibb's face. "You've got some fucking nerve to come back here after what you did." Gibb's searched desperately for an escape route, only to find that White had him backed against a wall. Trapped, he looked pleadingly at Manny.
"Jesus, Sarge! Th-this is where I'm bunked now." He stammered "Major Horowitz stripped me of my IFV certification and put me in with you guys until they can investigate...it could, uh, be a while."
"Oh that's just fucking perfect! Should I be worried you'll mistake me for a delta and shoot me?"
"No, I-" White grabbed Cpl. Gibbs by his shirt collar and slammed him against the wall. His face turned redder by second, until it nearly matched his hair.
"Or maybe I should save us all the trouble and put a bullet through your empty fucking skull while nobody's looking."
"Woah, woah. Be cool, man." Manny stepped in and tried to shove White away from the scrawny corporal before the situation got any worse. "Gibbs promised to try and make things right."
"Come on, don't be like that, Sarge. Please!" Gibbs said, desperation in his voice. "I'm sorry, I-"
"Don't fucking apologize to me! Save it for Cho's parents when they get here and find out that you gunned down their son!" Gibbs' head dropped in shame and White finally let him go.
"Hey, White." Manny said, "Didn't your wife want to see you?" White paused for a moment and nodded.
"Yeah. I'll see you around, Ortiz." He turned to Gibbs and told him to watch his ass in a menacing whisper. The corporal nodded frantically and slinked away, leaving Manny alone.
.
The first part of Chapter 2 is finally here. This one was a hell of a lot harder to write than the previous chapter, but I'm fairly satisfied at how it turned out. As always, constructive criticism is welcome, so let me know if something is 'off'.
I loved this chapter again mixed up your style as this was more about character depth then your previous chapter but even without the action I was hooked to every line. I love getting the insight into Manny's personality in this chapter getting to know him better. Overall think was another quality chapter I really feel more connected to the characters now and I'm really looking forward to more of your writing your very talented thanks for the share
**Chapter 2
4 Days In -- Robbins Joint Operations Base **
.
Manny cursed silently as Doc Horner unwrapped the bandages and started … moreprodding at his injured rib.
"You're a lucky bastard." The large African American man said in his distinctive Alabama drawl.
"Do lucky bastards gets shot twice in the same year?"
"Most folks who lose a fight with a 7.62mm machine gun don't live to tell the tale, let alone get shot again." Manny closed his eyes and tried to drive the image of Cho's bisected corpse out of his head. "Thankfully, your flak jacket took the worst of it. The fact you made it out with a couple of fragments and a fractured rib is a miracle by itself." The doctor looked dejectedly at the dying bite victims at the other side of the tent. "Plus, you uh...didn't end up like them poor souls."
"True enough." Manny conceded. "How's military life treating you, Doc?" He already had a pretty good idea, you could see the e… [view original content]
Brace yourself Markd, the next chapter of my newest Fanfic " Long shave ahead ", is " just around the corner " and will be as fantastic as always. (And you should probably prepare some paper towels, because this chapter will yet again, be a feels overload!)
Brace yourself Markd, the next chapter of my newest Fanfic " Long shave ahead ", is " just around the corner " and will be as fantastic as a… morelways. (And you should probably prepare some paper towels, because this chapter will yet again, be a feels overload!)
Once I'm done with part two, I might make some changes and publish the first two chapters. I'm not quite sure where the story is heading yet, so it might be a little while.
Maybe they'll get sent to Macon...not sure yet. It could be cool to tie it in with the S1 story somehow, especially with the Lee reference I dropped back in Chapter 1.
I loved this chapter again mixed up your style as this was more about character depth then your previous chapter but even without the action… more I was hooked to every line. I love getting the insight into Manny's personality in this chapter getting to know him better. Overall think was another quality chapter I really feel more connected to the characters now and I'm really looking forward to more of your writing your very talented thanks for the share
Thank ya kindly! Glad you're enjoying it.
Once I'm done with part two, I might make some changes and publish the first two chapters. I'… morem not quite sure where the story is heading yet, so it might be a little while.
Maybe they'll get sent to Macon...not sure yet. It could be cool to tie it in with the S1 story somehow, especially with the Lee reference I dropped back in Chapter 1.
Well, I'm a Danish sixth grader, so when my classmates describe me they describe me as very high (Because I'm very tall, and they're just not that good as English).
So here it is, the long awaited third chapter of my amazing Fanfic " long shave ahead ":
" More than 2 years have passed, as the journey of our handsome shaved hero continues. Even after losing his beloved Mustache and his beloved Bro, The Walking Mustache still moves forward and tries to find destiny. He found a new group of survivors and after they locked him into a shed for some unknown reason, they tried to make up for it again, by giving him some fresh Froot Loops. An awkward silence was feelable in the room, as Raging Blades finally breaks through the silence. "
" Not dramatic, but still quite sad, epic music. "
Raging_Blades: " So...what happened to your Mustache...? If you don't mind me asking. I mean, I assume what happened to yours is what happens to just about everyone's beards. You'r just such a Redneck...didn't think you could've made it on your own for so long, but maybe you did. "
The Walking Mustache: " I shaved it, if that's what your asking. "
Raging_Blades: " I was just curious on how you made it this far. "
The Walking Mustache: " I just tried to stay with good Bros and not to do anything Urban. "
Raging_Blades: " Hey, i'm sorry, I... I shouldn't have asked. "
The Walking Mustache: " This man found me and my family. He toke care of my Stache. We met up with other survivors and we all tried to go on a boat ride, but...it didn't work out. His name was Markd4547. He taught me how to use aftershave. That guy, he was always so serious. "
Raging_Blades: " Why so serious? "
The Walking Mustache " sigh...Urbans. "
Raging_Blades: " What, uh, happened to him...? "
The Walking Mustache: " The same thing that happens to everyone. But he shaved me, first. Lots of times. "
Raging_Blades: " Well sounds like he was a real good guy. "
So here it is, the long awaited third chapter of my amazing Fanfic " long shave ahead ":
" More than 2 years have passed, as the journey … moreof our handsome shaved hero continues. Even after losing his beloved Mustache and his beloved Bro, The Walking Mustache still moves forward and tries to find destiny. He found a new group of survivors and after they locked him into a shed for some unknown reason, they tried to make up for it again, by giving him some fresh Froot Loops. An awkward silence was feelable in the room, as Raging Blades finally breaks through the silence. "
" Not dramatic, but still quite sad, epic music. "
Raging_Blades: " So...what happened to your Mustache...? If you don't mind me asking. I mean, I assume what happened to yours is what happens to just about everyone's beards. You'r just such a Redneck...didn't think you could've made it on your own for so long, but maybe you did. "
The Walking Mustache: " I shaved it… [view original content]
lol superb again stache
He taught me how to use aftershave. That guy, he was always so serious. "
Raging_Blades: " Why so serious?
lmao YES YES YES LOVE IT!! MOAR
Well gues what, you won't have to wait any longer...because here it is!
" As the story of our handsome shaved hero continues, him and his new group is getting chased down by some maniacally retard. It was Travis, he was trying to get revenge for Ben's dramatic murder. Almost a week had passed, since they made their last break and they were all exhausted and needed to rest. What a surprising coincidence, that they accidently ran into an old ski lodge. But taking a rest was risky, Travis father was special forces, after all. And as if things wouldn't be complicated enough already, they did also run into a new group of survivors. "
" Dramatic, suitable music. "
Raging_Blades: " We ain't here to rob nobody, just put the gun down man. "
Stranger: " Fuck that. "
Random fat girl: " Please just do what he says. "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd?! "
Markd4547: " Stache... "
" The suitable dramatic music changes into a epic dramatic music, as the two Bros are giving each other a manly hug. "
Markd4547: " These people with you? We can talk inside. "
" The group enters the ski lodge and the two old friend are taking a seat in front of a shiny fire, as they talk about old memories. "
Markd4547: " You know i half expected to see your Stache walk up next to you. You guys were like two peas in a pod. "
The Walking Mustache: " sigh...we sure do looked like a match. "
Markd4547: " Oh, shit, I didn't mean to...it's just hard not to think about it, you know? "
The Walking Mustache: " You shaved me. "
Markd4547: " I knew it. I knew that i could. I had a fire in me, sure as shit. Hell. I am a hell of a guy...When your Stache...well...i toke care of it. I hope you'l never forget that. "
The Walking Mustache: " Where have you been? "
Markd4547: " Oh hell, all over after you shot me. "
The Walking Mustache: " How did you survive that. "
Markd4547: " I got into a hell of a mess, you gave me a hand and then it got messier. For a minute there it wasn't looking to good for old Markd. Long story short, I got lucky. Real lucky. "
The Walking Mustache: "But dude...i did shoot you in the face! "
Markd4547: " ...real lucky! Spent a long time alone after that. It uh... "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd? "
Markd4547: " uh... Gosh, it's great that you are back. "
Well gues what, you won't have to wait any longer...because here it is!
" As the story of our handsome shaved hero continues, him and… more his new group is getting chased down by some maniacally retard. It was Travis, he was trying to get revenge for Ben's dramatic murder. Almost a week had passed, since they made their last break and they were all exhausted and needed to rest. What a surprising coincidence, that they accidently ran into an old ski lodge. But taking a rest was risky, Travis father was special forces, after all. And as if things wouldn't be complicated enough already, they did also run into a new group of survivors. "
" Dramatic, suitable music. "
Raging_Blades: " We ain't here to rob nobody, just put the gun down man. "
Stranger: " Fuck that. "
Random fat girl: " Please just do what he says. "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd?! "
Markd4547: " Stache... "
" The suitable dramatic music changes into a epic dr… [view original content]
You are Luke as well;D (Looks like in this part you were Alvin, sorry Bro)
You can find the other parts on page 16/17 of Markds thread. I suggest you to check it out!
lol perfection but on a serious side I need to compliment you these story's are unique, creative and innovative using actual events and turning the situations around for a comedic scene. how you manage to mix the comedy into actual scenes but in a hilarious way is just genius quality .
The manly hugs, Tavis retart, Lucky, all staches jokes, dramatic music and the little details I love like the way your using actual quotes from TWD just genius.
Well gues what, you won't have to wait any longer...because here it is!
" As the story of our handsome shaved hero continues, him and… more his new group is getting chased down by some maniacally retard. It was Travis, he was trying to get revenge for Ben's dramatic murder. Almost a week had passed, since they made their last break and they were all exhausted and needed to rest. What a surprising coincidence, that they accidently ran into an old ski lodge. But taking a rest was risky, Travis father was special forces, after all. And as if things wouldn't be complicated enough already, they did also run into a new group of survivors. "
" Dramatic, suitable music. "
Raging_Blades: " We ain't here to rob nobody, just put the gun down man. "
Stranger: " Fuck that. "
Random fat girl: " Please just do what he says. "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd?! "
Markd4547: " Stache... "
" The suitable dramatic music changes into a epic dr… [view original content]
The Walking Mustache: "But dude...i did shoot you in the face! "
Markd4547: " ...real lucky! "
Probably my favorite part of the whole Fanfic, lol. Thanks again for another nice response and i can assure you that the story will definitely go on! (Maybe i will call the next chapter " Travis revenge " let's wait and find out;)
dem feels :')
lol perfection but on a serious side I need to compliment you these story's are unique, creative and innovative using actua… morel events and turning the situations around for a comedic scene. how you manage to mix the comedy into actual scenes but in a hilarious way is just genius quality .
The manly hugs, Tavis retart, Lucky, all staches jokes, dramatic music and the little details I love like the way your using actual quotes from TWD just genius.
So I got most of Clayton's picture done but the problem is.... there's a complication with a certain character's colour scheme cuz I don't know wtf it is! I'm not sure if I should wait for a answer, make up the colours, or make it black and white. T_T
So I got most of Clayton's picture done but the problem is.... there's a complication with a certain character's colour scheme cuz I don't k… morenow wtf it is! I'm not sure if I should wait for a answer, make up the colours, or make it black and white. T_T
Yup and in the cinema I had five children before me talking annoying or when somebody dies you like they were making a joke about it... Where is my rock I was thinking...
I want the next movie but we must wait untill 2016... I found somebody with my commentary about the first three movies http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvkCv5cCD5Y
Comments
Yep, guilty as charged. I took an AP writing course in high school and never stopped.
I wouldn't worry too much about rambling, your story is from a scientist's point-of-view, so it kind of fits the character's voice. I really dig the amount of research that obviously went into your work. I've been spending some time researching how the Georgia National Guard operates. I gotta take some artistic liberties (ex. Georgia National Guard didn't deploy to Iraq until after the invasion), but it's good to be grounded in reality.
**Chapter 2
4 Days In -- Robbins Joint Operations Base **
.
Manny cursed silently as Doc Horner unwrapped the bandages and started prodding at his injured rib.
"You're a lucky bastard." The large African American man said in his distinctive Alabama drawl.
"Do lucky bastards gets shot twice in the same year?"
"Most folks who lose a fight with a 7.62mm machine gun don't live to tell the tale, let alone get shot again." Manny closed his eyes and tried to drive the image of Cho's bisected corpse out of his head. "Thankfully, your flak jacket took the worst of it. The fact you made it out with a couple of fragments and a fractured rib is a miracle by itself." The doctor looked dejectedly at the dying bite victims at the other side of the tent. "Plus, you uh...didn't end up like them poor souls."
"True enough." Manny conceded. "How's military life treating you, Doc?" He already had a pretty good idea, you could see the exhaustion on the doctor's face.
"Pretty well, all things considered." The large man chuckled miserably. "I'm a family doctor...ain't treated wounds like this since Grenada, and that was oh...21 years ago. Beats the hell outta being food for them crazies though." After a long silence, Doc Horne wrapped a fresh bandage around the wound and started scribbling in his notepad.
"Soooo, I'm cleared for duty?"
"LIGHT duty." The doctor corrected him. "Remember, you lost a lot of blood. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't allow it, but things outside are getting worse all the time and the brass needs everyone they can get. I'll give you some painkillers for the ribs, but our supplies are running low, so otherwise you're on yo-"
"DOC!" A voice called from outside the medical tent. Two men jogged in, carrying a groaning Marine, with his left leg chopped off at the knee. Doc Horner looked at the victim, swore and turned back to Manny.
"Ortiz, the rest of your stuff is in Hangar 2A with your unit, you can show yourself out, god bless." He didn't need to be told twice. Manny got up, grabbed his things and walked into the summer heat. Each step sent a dull ache through his chest, but it felt good to finally be on his feet.
The base was a mad rush of activity. Hundreds of soldiers from all branches of the military and their families set up camp in hangars and tent cities scattered around the Tarmac. Guards were stationed at improvised watchtowers all along the perimeter. In spite of everything, the atmosphere at the base felt oddly cheerful.
"Move it!" A Humvee full of Marines honked and yelled, snapping Manny out of his thoughts. He crossed a runaway and made his way toward the hangar serving as a makeshift barracks for most of Blackhawk Company. On the way there he found Sgt. White speaking with wife, Linda. She was hard to miss with her long platinum blonde hair.
"Jake, dear; look who it is."
"Hey," White beamed, "Didn't expect to see you back on your feet this soon."
"Hey, Manny." Linda chirped "Glad to see you're doing ok." They were an odd couple; Sgt. White towered over Linda, who was barely over five feet tall.
"Thanks!" He smiled back, "I'm glad to see you made it here alright, Linda. Things are getting pretty bad out there."
"Yeah, me too." White added nervously. "It was...a close call, y'know? Good thing my girl knows how to take care of herself." He smiled and gave his wife a quick kiss. "I'll meet you back at the tent in a bit, darling. Gotta show Manny where he's sleeping." She nodded and walked toward the tent city, while Manny and White continued on to the barracks. White was grinning, but the way he was forcing it reminded Manny of a constipated dog. Finally, he dropped the act and started shaking his head.
"She's pregnant." White blurted, once his wife was out of earshot.
"Wha-?" White cut him off
"Yeah, that was kind of my reaction too. Fucking wonderful timing, ain't it?"
"You could say that...what are you two going to do?" White grimaced, clearly unsure of how to answer.
"I don't know, man. This shit ain't blowing over, at least for a long fucking time...how am I supposed to be a Dad knowing that what happened to Cho could happen to me at any given day? Remember what happened to Lt. Marsh back in Nasiriyah? Pretty wife, two kids in pre-school? Then somebody had to tell em' that Daddy got blown up by some fucker with an RPG." He hesitated, staring at the ground. "I don't want her to have to deal with that."
"That's always a risk." Manny said earnestly. "She knew what she signed up for."
"Yeah." White sighed, trying to shake the unpleasant thought from his mind. How about your folks? They make it here?" Manny's throat tightened with worry.
"No, it's eating away at me." He admitted, "I told them to pick up abuela in Macon and head to the base, but...I don't know."
"Try not to worry about it. They'll get here." White said with genuine sympathy.
"I hope so...I treated them like shit the day I left for UGA." The pair finished the rest of their walk to the hangar in silence. They pushed through the large metal building, hastily filled with cots, storage containers and other guardsmen. When the pair reached Manny's bunk, Corporal Gibbs was waiting or them. White's expression changed to an angry glare as he stalked toward the driver, who's blue eyes appraised White nervously.
"What are you doing here, Corporal?" He demanded, placing himself mere inches from Gibb's face. "You've got some fucking nerve to come back here after what you did." Gibb's searched desperately for an escape route, only to find that White had him backed against a wall. Trapped, he looked pleadingly at Manny.
"Jesus, Sarge! Th-this is where I'm bunked now." He stammered "Major Horowitz stripped me of my IFV certification and put me in with you guys until they can investigate...it could, uh, be a while."
"Oh that's just fucking perfect! Should I be worried you'll mistake me for a delta and shoot me?"
"No, I-" White grabbed Cpl. Gibbs by his shirt collar and slammed him against the wall. His face turned redder by second, until it nearly matched his hair.
"Or maybe I should save us all the trouble and put a bullet through your empty fucking skull while nobody's looking."
"Woah, woah. Be cool, man." Manny stepped in and tried to shove White away from the scrawny corporal before the situation got any worse. "Gibbs promised to try and make things right."
"Come on, don't be like that, Sarge. Please!" Gibbs said, desperation in his voice. "I'm sorry, I-"
"Don't fucking apologize to me! Save it for Cho's parents when they get here and find out that you gunned down their son!" Gibbs' head dropped in shame and White finally let him go.
"Hey, White." Manny said, "Didn't your wife want to see you?" White paused for a moment and nodded.
"Yeah. I'll see you around, Ortiz." He turned to Gibbs and told him to watch his ass in a menacing whisper. The corporal nodded frantically and slinked away, leaving Manny alone.
.
The first part of Chapter 2 is finally here. This one was a hell of a lot harder to write than the previous chapter, but I'm fairly satisfied at how it turned out. As always, constructive criticism is welcome, so let me know if something is 'off'.
I loved this chapter again mixed up your style as this was more about character depth then your previous chapter but even without the action I was hooked to every line. I love getting the insight into Manny's personality in this chapter getting to know him better. Overall think was another quality chapter I really feel more connected to the characters now and I'm really looking forward to more of your writing your very talented thanks for the share
Okay I'm currently still writing out Chapter 3 of my story and I want to let ClaytonBoylan know that I will finish that picture tonight.
Cool can't wait didn't see Clay in ages though
Brace yourself Markd, the next chapter of my newest Fanfic " Long shave ahead ", is " just around the corner " and will be as fantastic as always. (And you should probably prepare some paper towels, because this chapter will yet again, be a feels overload!)
Bring dem feels hope I survive another heartbreaking chapter :')
Thank ya kindly! Glad you're enjoying it.
Once I'm done with part two, I might make some changes and publish the first two chapters. I'm not quite sure where the story is heading yet, so it might be a little while.
Maybe they'll get sent to Macon...not sure yet. It could be cool to tie it in with the S1 story somehow, especially with the Lee reference I dropped back in Chapter 1.
Going to try and make a fanfic for this, prepare for reading some shitty stuffs.
Yes they are my favorite stuff and things I read your story's before your awesome and very talented I can't wait
Looking forward to it.
Cool and thanks again for sharing your story it's definitely one of the best I read on this thread and I can't wait for more
Me? Talented? Hohoho, you found Eddie's sticky?
lol Still counts!! but seriously your army stories are awesome
Well, I'm a Danish sixth grader, so when my classmates describe me they describe me as very high (Because I'm very tall, and they're just not that good as English).
Well...you already died in the last one;D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zXDo4dL7SU
I will Post it later today, i am to drunk right now!
lol fair enough can't wait
So here it is, the long awaited third chapter of my amazing Fanfic " long shave ahead ":
" More than 2 years have passed, as the journey of our handsome shaved hero continues. Even after losing his beloved Mustache and his beloved Bro, The Walking Mustache still moves forward and tries to find destiny. He found a new group of survivors and after they locked him into a shed for some unknown reason, they tried to make up for it again, by giving him some fresh Froot Loops. An awkward silence was feelable in the room, as Raging Blades finally breaks through the silence. "
" Not dramatic, but still quite sad, epic music. "
Raging_Blades: " So...what happened to your Mustache...? If you don't mind me asking. I mean, I assume what happened to yours is what happens to just about everyone's beards. You'r just such a Redneck...didn't think you could've made it on your own for so long, but maybe you did. "
The Walking Mustache: " I shaved it, if that's what your asking. "
Raging_Blades: " I was just curious on how you made it this far. "
The Walking Mustache: " I just tried to stay with good Bros and not to do anything Urban. "
Raging_Blades: " Hey, i'm sorry, I... I shouldn't have asked. "
The Walking Mustache: " This man found me and my family. He toke care of my Stache. We met up with other survivors and we all tried to go on a boat ride, but...it didn't work out. His name was Markd4547. He taught me how to use aftershave. That guy, he was always so serious. "
Raging_Blades: " Why so serious? "
The Walking Mustache " sigh...Urbans. "
Raging_Blades: " What, uh, happened to him...? "
The Walking Mustache: " The same thing that happens to everyone. But he shaved me, first. Lots of times. "
Raging_Blades: " Well sounds like he was a real good guy. "
The Walking Mustache: " Yea, he was. "
And you won't have to...grab yourself a thumbs up button and start responding!
lol Gone all day I was just online for only about 20 seconds just now lol Stache patience but lets take a look at this masterpiece
lol superb again stache
He taught me how to use aftershave. That guy, he was always so serious. "
Raging_Blades: " Why so serious?
lmao YES YES YES LOVE IT!! MOAR
Ahhhh, I seriously need to post the next chapter of my story on here. Rayne and Max definitely needs some screen time again.
You want MOAR?
Next time on the " long shave ahead " our handsome shaved hero is gonna meet some old friend at a ski lodge.
Definitely please that would be awesome
(whispers) The next chapter to my other story is available on the other topic, if you haven't seen it yet.
Really YES!! I'll head over soon and take a look
YES
Well gues what, you won't have to wait any longer...because here it is!
" As the story of our handsome shaved hero continues, him and his new group is getting chased down by some maniacally retard. It was Travis, he was trying to get revenge for Ben's dramatic murder. Almost a week had passed, since they made their last break and they were all exhausted and needed to rest. What a surprising coincidence, that they accidently ran into an old ski lodge. But taking a rest was risky, Travis father was special forces, after all. And as if things wouldn't be complicated enough already, they did also run into a new group of survivors. "
" Dramatic, suitable music. "
Raging_Blades: " We ain't here to rob nobody, just put the gun down man. "
Stranger: " Fuck that. "
Random fat girl: " Please just do what he says. "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd?! "
Markd4547: " Stache... "
" The suitable dramatic music changes into a epic dramatic music, as the two Bros are giving each other a manly hug. "
Markd4547: " These people with you? We can talk inside. "
" The group enters the ski lodge and the two old friend are taking a seat in front of a shiny fire, as they talk about old memories. "
Markd4547: " You know i half expected to see your Stache walk up next to you. You guys were like two peas in a pod. "
The Walking Mustache: " sigh...we sure do looked like a match. "
Markd4547: " Oh, shit, I didn't mean to...it's just hard not to think about it, you know? "
The Walking Mustache: " You shaved me. "
Markd4547: " I knew it. I knew that i could. I had a fire in me, sure as shit. Hell. I am a hell of a guy...When your Stache...well...i toke care of it. I hope you'l never forget that. "
The Walking Mustache: " Where have you been? "
Markd4547: " Oh hell, all over after you shot me. "
The Walking Mustache: " How did you survive that. "
Markd4547: " I got into a hell of a mess, you gave me a hand and then it got messier. For a minute there it wasn't looking to good for old Markd. Long story short, I got lucky. Real lucky. "
The Walking Mustache: "But dude...i did shoot you in the face! "
Markd4547: " ...real lucky! Spent a long time alone after that. It uh... "
The Walking Mustache: " Markd? "
Markd4547: " uh... Gosh, it's great that you are back. "
:O. Am I Alvin?
Oh and I only read you're latest two parts, could you put it all in one part so I can read it all? If not its fine. Great writing man
You are Luke as well;D (Looks like in this part you were Alvin, sorry Bro)
You can find the other parts on page 16/17 of Markds thread. I suggest you to check it out!
Coolio. I'm going to start reading it now!
dem feels :')
lol perfection but on a serious side I need to compliment you these story's are unique, creative and innovative using actual events and turning the situations around for a comedic scene. how you manage to mix the comedy into actual scenes but in a hilarious way is just genius quality
.
The manly hugs, Tavis retart, Lucky, all staches jokes, dramatic music and the little details I love like the way your using actual quotes from TWD just genius.
The Walking Mustache: "But dude...i did shoot you in the face! "
Markd4547: " ...real lucky! "
Probably my favorite part of the whole Fanfic, lol. Thanks again for another nice response and i can assure you that the story will definitely go on! (Maybe i will call the next chapter " Travis revenge " let's wait and find out;)
So I got most of Clayton's picture done but the problem is.... there's a complication with a certain character's colour scheme cuz I don't know wtf it is! I'm not sure if I should wait for a answer, make up the colours, or make it black and white. T_T
Hard one I'm not sure
Have you seen the new X men movie I was gonna ask you a few weeks ago but forgot it
Yeah it was awesome loved the ending so many feels ;')
Yup and in the cinema I had five children before me talking annoying or when somebody dies you like they were making a joke about it... Where is my rock I was thinking...
I want the next movie but we must wait untill 2016... I found somebody with my commentary about the first three movies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvkCv5cCD5Y
Arkham Knight Gameplay begins at... Wait a moment.
HERE
Dinsdag 10 juni
17:30 - IGN's Nintendo Pre-Show
18:00 - Nintendo Digital Evenement
19:00 - IGN's Post-Show (w/ Special Guest)
21:00 - Sunset Overdrive
21:20 - Fable Legends
21:40 - Killer Instinct Season 2
22:00 - The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt
22:20 - Destiny
22:40 - PlayStation-game
23:00 - Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare
23:20 - Nintendo Game
23:40 - Batman: Arkham Knight
00:00 - Dragon Age: Inquisition
00:20 - PlayStation-game
01:20 - Battlefield: Hardline
01:40 - Homefront: The Revolution
02:00 - The Division
02:20 - Civilization: Beyond Earth
02:40 - Below
03:00 - PlayStation-game
03:20 - PlayStation-game
03:40 - PlayStation-game