Story time!
Now, let's gather around the campfire and tell each other stories about our lives, whether it be funny, sad, scary, glad, mad etc., here's where you post it! Tell as many stories as you please.
Feel free to spam this forum with multiple stories, cause I know I will! I love telling stories!
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So when I was in kindergarten the teacher was going around and asking different kids what their favorite songs were. Kids were saying typical things, like Old McDonald and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, but... I did not stay inside those lines. Nonono, I said Cocaine. By Eric Clapton.
It ended with a very hilarious call home.
Also, one time when we were little, my twin sister and I had this giant jar of confetti and since our mom told us it was okay to make a mess as long as we could clean it up, we, of course, spread it around the entire house and spent the next to days cleaning up the house and pulling confetti out of our hair. We still flinch every time we see confetti.
Our next door neighbor Dave has always been obsessed with his cars. He cleans them at least twice a week, even in winter. Once day he rolled over a paint can and he spent the next week under the car with a toothbrush. Real OCD about that kind of stuff.
One day, when I was 9 or so, I was biking down the street with a few people, having a good time and all that. I was pedalling as fast as I could when someone called out to me from the other side of the street. Being the dumb child I was, I turned to wave at the person....and steered directly into Dave's parked car. I was pitched on to the hood, bounced my head off the windshield and hit the ground hard. I credit my lack of brain damage to wearing a skateboarding helmet that day. Dave saw all this happen from the porch, screamed "MY CAR!" And ran over to check the damage. I had to get up and stagger home, bleeding and whimpering while fucking Dave chewed me out. All in all, I had to get stitches and we paid Dave to have his windshield replaced. It was almost worth it just to see the look on his face. :P
That's rather amusing :P I can think of two stories involving bikes, however they're very short, so I'm going to write them like a public safety message from the 1950s. Feel free to imagine an appropriate voice over.
"Enjoying a nice bike ride in your local park?
Little Tommy is, aren't you Tommy?
He sure is folks!
Uh-oh, looks like there's something up ahead that could spoil Tommy's ride: a set of iron bars designed to stop those dreaded motorcylists! (I don't have anything against motorcyclists, however parks in Britain do have these iron things you have to weave through that's supposed to stop them.)
The problem is, Tommy's brakes are wet from ridding through puddles, and he needs to stop before he gets to the bars. But Tommy's braked too late! And now his chin's gashed opened.
chuckles Oh well, Tommy. Next time you'll know to brake sooner when riding in wet conditions!"
'Tommy', i.e. me, had to be taken to A&E to have his chin skin glued back together as the bone was apparently showing. Still have the scar.
Next.
"What's that you've got there, Jennifer? Why, it's a light for a bike!
Are you going to riding in the dark, Jennifer? That's a mighty big nod of agreement!
The thing is folks, despite the illumination, children of a certain type can still ride into obstacles while riding at night, such as lamp-posts or streetlights on the side of a path next to a fence.
At least you won't make that mistake, right, Jennifer?
chuckles No, of course not."
Yup, I rode into a streetlight, that was quite possibly lit, with a light on the front if my bike. Perhaps that chin damage did more to me than I realised :P
That was perfect! Haha! My god that must've hurt.
One time my twin sister and I were babysitting these kids named Nick and Ian. It was a dark and stormy night. I'm not saying that to be dramatic it literally was a dark and stormy night. So, after we put the kids to bed my sister and I went into the kitchen and started watching a show on the iPad to entertain ourselves.
However, there was a large boom of thunder and the power went out. It was dark for a few seconds, but when the lightning struck, we saw Nick, almost as if he teleported, standing in the kitchen. We both gasped. He said "I'm scared" like a creepy little kid from a horror movie, so I went down with the flashlight and put them both to bed.
Later on that night, as if we weren't already scared enough, our flashlight ran out of battery so I had to run across the street to our house in the storm late at night to get batteries.
That was one of the scariest (and probably one of the most fun) nights. I know it sounds like dramatized some of this, but I literally didn't. It was like a horror movie.
And to think, they say I'm blind...
Once, I was an ugly barnacle,
I was so ugly, that everyone died.
The end.
Lik if you cry ev- I'm kidding I'm not gonna finish typing that HAHA.
Once I jumped off a mini cliff in Bonaire and saw octopuses and turtles and fish in Bonaire. And wild donkeys who followed us while we sat in the back of a pickup truck.
*EDIT During that trip I heroically saved a pair of goggles from their doom by swimming several feet under the ocean. Okay maybe it was just a few feet but it was beyond my comfort. It was quite a feat. I WAS SO PROUD.
**EEEEDDDIIITTTT I didn't mean to say feat and feet so many times please accept my sincerest apologies.
"That didn't help at all."
I WILL NOT YEILD. Anyway one time this kid Kenny gave me a Hershey's kiss it was awesome. (especially because his name was Kenny which is freaking awesome)
Also this is a gross one prepare yourself...
So just this year I was walking in the hallway with my friend to lunch and she said she was starting to feel sick. Later on, she asked me if I would walk with her to the nurse. When I did, she walked over to a trash can and dry heaved. That wasn't even the worst part.
Halfway there, I look back and see her blow chunks. In the middle of the hall. I almost gagged myself but I didn't want to make her feel bad so I called for help and walked her the rest of the way. I went back to class and got her stuff for her and she went home.
I felt so bad for her!
LOL, this conversation is perfection at its finest. XD
Reminds me of a time with a friend and his daughter. He wanted to encourage her to dance, but she didn't want to. Until the song Cocaine came on, and then she hopped up and danced to that one! I've lost touch, but that daughter would be in her 20s by now. I wonder how she turned out.
Yes, yes it is HAHA!
Probably amazing seeing as she liked Eric Clapton, haha! He was my FAVORITE when I was little. My mom even took me to a concert. But I was so small that all I could see was the back of some sweaty bald guy's head. But that didn't make me love it any less. I mean there were those screens, too, so it wasn't like I couldn't see anything. Even though I will forever remember the back of that guy's head, I will also always remember how much I enjoyed sitting next to my mom at an Eric Clapton concert.
One time I logged onto the forum.
THE END
I'm assuming Bonaire is in Vermont or Quebec?
Seriously cannot wait for the sequel to this.
There was a lot of blood, though the chin incident hurt more when it came to removing the sticky plastic thing they used to glue it together - the skin was too thin for stitches. I had to use a lot of hot water to make it peel. I did have to have stitches below my lip when my dog, in her excitement, jumped up and teared it open a little. Again a lot of blood, and again I still have the scar! None of these are particularly heroic injuries though haha
How did Ian cope through all this? I always find the best thing to do in those situations is to avoid the basement - in horror movies, good things do not happen in basements.
There was this one time where a few friends and myself rented a boat - nothing fancy - just to have a go at being out on the open ocean, and maybe for the sense of freedom. Anyway, this storm rolled in and there were huge waves, knocking us all about till we didn't know where we were! Eventually, we came across this island - which we basically crashed into - that was full of cats! They took us prisoner, and, being both sassy and grouchy in nature, forced us to perform in their nefarious theatres of traps for their sordid entertainment! I remember -- oh no, wait. That was a video game. I really was once charged at by a bunch of rather large pigs, though, and narrowly avoided being trampled.
And then Reginald comes upstairs and he's all like: "I say, gentlemen, I do believe that we're in quite a spot of bother!" And everyone else was like: "Really?! What tipped you off, genius?"
Plus, I think I love you. Here, have all my butter products.
Yes! And there was this huge whale that was like, "waaaha!", that made it super scary!
So many butter products! We can sail off on the SS Friend Ship and never have to worry about baking ingredients ever again.
That's right, my friend. We never shall worry again. The dough will rise, the batter will be beat, and the trail mix will be consumed.
Not too nutty, not too sweet: trail mix is just right. It'll be a fine journey.
Plus, the boat smells nice, because of the baking.
He was playing Angry Birds on the iPad unfortunately, haha!
No actually it's way further than that. It's off the coast of Puerto Rico. South America. It was a 7 hour flight. xD
Here let me write it for you... prepare yourself... hold on you can't rush perfection... here we go...
After I logged into the forum I started a discussion. Were there comments? DID I GET LIKES ON MY COMMENTS?!?!?!?! DID ANYONE PM ME!??!?!?!?!?!? DID A COOL PERSON MENTION ME IN THE FORUMS!?!??!?!?!??!?!?!?!??! to be continued.
... Close enough.
Alright. Previously on the The Walking Cool Story:
I ate some ramen and read this comment while drinking coke.
Fin
OH COME ON I WANT MORE. THERE ARE SO MANY QUESTIONS THAT NEED ANSWERS. MY GOD THIS IS MY FAVORITE STORY EVER IT'S BETTER THAN EPISODE 4.
OH a cool person mentioned me in the forums HAHA!
On a more serious note than my previous comment, I discovered that my family is full of Emperors, Empresses and other sorts of nobility.
I guess, haha!
I don't consider myself cool as in 'popular' but I am kind of cool as in 'friendly and agreeable' I guess.