Possible Fanfiction!
So, hey guys, I've always loved reading fanfics, but I never thought of making one myself, but here I am now, working on one. I had this idea in my mind about a story that happens in a world based on Westeros, with the same costumes and traditions, but that isn't the same as the one George R. R. Martin created. We have a different map, different houses and so on. I've made a sketch for the prologue, and here it is:
All the comments are welcome, and the critics too. If you guys are interested, please let me know and I'll keep working on this, and I will also explain this "new" world I created, the houses and everything else. And also sorry, English is not my first language, but I hope you'll enjoy it anyway.
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Comments
Nicely done, I like it! I especially enjoy the world building and the general suspense you create. This shows a lot of potential, hopefully you decide to continue expanding this. Consider me very interested in reading more
I'll read you for sure.Keep the good work Laladreams
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Thanks a lot!! I'll continue on working on it then. I'll post more details about the world soon =D
ps: Just so you know, your story was one of the main reasons I started working on mine, so, thanks a lot for that too
Thanksss! I'll post more info soon, possibly in a new thread. =D
Very cool bro
There is definitely great potential in your writing.
One thing you should take care of, is the quotation in your writing - make it clear what is being said, and what is not.
Instead of doing: _____ -- said x as he went down the stairs -- ______ ; try the more orderly: "_____" x said as he went down the stairs "_____"
This would also eliminate the need for the use of "-". However, it depends on your writing style and what you're most comfortable with.
I know this is only the prologue, so it's really a bit early to give a meaningful comment on it, but see if you could divide the chapter into sections, with empty lines between (sorry if that didn't make any sense, I'm unsure of the English word for it). It simply gives a more organized overview for the reader, as well as provides a time skip or give the reader a needed pause, should that your intent.
A minor nitpick, to which little attention deserves to be paid, is your use of "And" as the first word in a sentence. I know you've only started lines with the word 4 times, and it is of course no big deal, but I feel you should be aware of it. You make it work in the line "And so his brother came closer...", but the three other time you use it, the word could simply be removed without consequence.
The ending of the prologue is great. The short sentences, the simple, powerful words create a strong atmosphere of fear, hopelesness and dread. Keep it up.
Guys, I've been slowly working on this fanon, but if you are still interested, here are 3 characters that will appear in the series =D
Good artwork,you can see the work behind it