...Get the map to Strong Badia,then look for the obvious dot smack tab on the middle of the map. When you find Dripping Orange Madness, tell her about bubs and she talk about...
the economic crisis and how the rising cost of milk has driven her family to drinking (shudder) powdered milk. If only milk were cheaper she might be able to go back to drinking real milk. She says that if she could do that then she could get her mind off the disgusting taste of (shudder shudder) powdered milk and she might be able to remember where she hid her secret savings thirteen years ago, and she might be able to pay back Bubs. She asks you to see what you can do about making milk cheaper, so you...
...and, whaddya know? Milk is cheaper, now! Once Dripping Orange madness thanks you and awards you with the shavings, give it to Bubs, and he will award you with the paint bucket. Smear the paint on the lighthouse and...
...the lighthouse is open for business! On duty (tee-hee...duty) look out the window and you'll see a ship coming. Turn off the light on the lighthouse and the ship will wreck on the shore. Go to the ship and talk to a guy who goes by the name Captain Vincent. He'll talk to you about...
At which point you decide that gnawing your own leg off might be a more better way to spend your time, so you begin to do so. After a while though, you realize that instead of gnawing your own leg off, you could just walk away. Shortly after you start to do that, you pass out (from all the hemorrhaging caused by trying to gnaw your own leg off) and fall forward, landing your face squarely on top of a large slug. This causes most of its insides to squirt out, in a beautifully grotesque display, which angers...
Bludgeon people over the head with so you don't have to be defenseless when you're reloading your AK-47. Eventually you should make it to The Promised Land, which for completely arbitrary reasons is ruled by John Wayne and The Crazy Cat Lady from The Simpson's. In order to get them to let you pass through to Free Country USA (or wherever it is you're trying to go) you must...
...You must talk to Homestar. Homestar begs Strong Bad to join him on his quest. Then eventually, Homestar tells Strong Bad that since it's a game he must join anyway. Then Strong Bad screams at the top of his lungs while the camera zooms out. Congrats!!! you've unlocked Homestar mode!!!
Constantly referring to him as "(your) dog" and NOT beating the everloving snot out of him, at any time, ever. Eventually, no matter what you (the player) do, Strong Bad gets tired of these things and punches Homestar repeatedly in the face, repeating the montra "You are NOT my dog!". This causes Homestar to...
Before he quickly proceeds to pummel whoever it is he deems responsible for the thing that has angered him, at which point an Ugly Bird flying directly overhead inexplicably anounces that he is not a fan of the style of humor which is being utilized by someone who calls himself "antirikurox". The Ugly Bird then (also inexplicably) grabs ahold of the Thnikkaman and takes him on a magical journey to a faraway land. Meanwhile, Strong Bad...
Because Bubs is "Lost in Space". You don't particularly feel like going into space today, so instead you call up Original Bubs and ask if he wants the job back. Original Bubs responds by saying that he can "see you, from here." which makes you hang up the phone immediately and look around suspiciously. When you turn around you find that Original Bubs has (not done anything involving poop or the poopsmith's shovel) but has...
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