And I've now been reminded to upload a Domain chapter later today.
This line, right here:
“You’ve seen him…” Atlanta frowned. “You’ve seen him kill. What should make us think he wouldn’t kill her? He’s been great this last week or so… but you know how he was before. He’ll get worked up. He’ll get mad. He’ll fucking… kill her.”
Foreshadowing. And I see as a veiled reference to this:
Chapter 3: “Sin” - Part 4: “I”.
Atlanta Roberts
Josephine said regretfully. “We’ll have to leave. There’s no sense staying...” She bi… moret her lip as Atlanta approached from the RV and joined the conversation. “Atlanta…” Josephine addressed her arrival.
“So…” Atlanta said, “are we leaving or looking?” She asked, disappointedly frowning when Jerry’s eyes met with hers, sharing a common sad look.
“Christian is not coming, we know this.” Jerry claimed as he stepped back towards the RV and the truck. Breaking eye contact with Atlanta, he stopped with his back turned towards the two. “We’re leaving.”
“Right…” Atlanta gloomy replied and followed him, up until she entered the RV and he made his way to the truck parked in front of the camper. Josephine was left alone outside. She regretfully turned one last time to the woods behind her, it was time to move on. Following Atlanta's lead, she entered the RV and shut the door behind her.
A… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a hult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“You go on ahead…” Jerry said, “I’m gonna see if I can find gas in that barn. There’s bound to be something worth a damn.”
“C’mon, Dan!” Ashley called to the boy as she stepped out of the RV and began walking towards. “Can… Can I stay with Jordan?” Daniel asked while Sticking his head out of the RV.
Ashley and Atlanta stopped. There eyes crossed each others and Ashley called back, “C’mon, Daniel.” Ashley asked one again, more firmly this time. Dan lowered his head slightly and followed the couple quickly.
Jerry entered the Barn and Atlanta, Ashley and Daniel approached the house while Josephine remained outside the property with Jordan. “They’re checking out the Farmhouse and Barn, in case you wanted to know.” Josie informed Jordan as she stepped into the RV’s cabin, sooning sitting herself at the driver’s seat. “We haven’t talked much.” Josephine added.
“I guess not…” Jordan muttered in reply. “I, uh…” She trailed off, unable to continue talking.
“Are you okay?” Josephine questioned. “You don’t look like you’ve felt good. Well, I don’t blame anyone for not being comfortable in this state. But you and I haven’t had a single conversation that I can recall. Now that I think about it… I didn’t see you talk with anyone in the last ten days… other than… Christian.” She felt guilty for bringing up the missing young man. “I’m sorry, you know. I made the call to leave.”
“I…” Jordan stuttered, put-off by Josephine’s apaulogy. “I understand the choice you made...”
“Yeah, well…” Josephine scratched the back of her head and paused.
“I…” Jordan muttered. She felt her eyes growing watery. “I need to step out…” She said. And before Josephine could question her, she was out the door.
Jordan heard the dust and dirt crush and crumble beneath her boots as she looked for a place to walk. She raised her hand to her cheek and felt a warm tear roll across it. Every second her thought filled with what she had done. The pain she had caused. The problems she had created. The things that could have happen. All because of her, or lack of an attempt to stop it before it amassed into a larger problem. How could she attempt to hide her actions from the victim of them?
A second sound joined the mix as the sound of crunching gravel and dust followed her. She turned around to face this new sound. It wasn’t who, or what, she thought it was.
Jerry pulled stepped out of the Barn with a large, red can of gas in his hand. His vision fell upon the truck and Jordan who stood in front of it. He immediately sensed something was wrong, the look on Jordan’s face telled all.
He set the gas on the ground and his hand lowered to his pistol where he let his hand rest on it’s grip. Hey!” Jerry yelled to Jordan. Her head whipped around to the voice and she stared daggers at him. There was something wrong. Jordan didn’t risk yelling bac. Instead she ran into the RV and slammed the door shut. Jerry looked towards the Farmhouse with a worried look. “That was… odd,” he thought to himself. His vision drifted back towards the RV and he saw… it - a truck rolled down the road they came from, followed by another, and another...
Okay, well, where to begin... I'm sorry, I guess. I haven't been actively posting nor have I kept up with others' stories. But I'm back for now. I'm back and I'm gonna keep writing for this.
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Woohoo, a new part! And don't be sorry for the delay, the awesomeness of this story is worth every second of waiting!
It isn't over until it's actually over
This is the best thing I've heard all day!
[Run to the house.]
He has to warn the others. I guess these trucks contain loads of Zafir people, which would be horrible, but even if they don't, I'm not exactly looking forward to meet people who drive around in trucks. Such people always mean trouble in a Zombie Apocalypse. If it is Zafir, then Jerry has to get the group out of there, since I am sure that not even the completely guiltless Josie and Dan will be safe from his wrath or worse. Oh shit, shit, shit, I'm extremely nervous for the group now.
Also:
It wasn’t who, or what, she thought it was.
This 'what' gives me a bad feeling...
By the way, I especially liked that interaction between Jordan and Josie, as short as it was. I can't wait until she learns the truth, albeit I still have no idea how she will react. This small interaction showed that Josie apparently cares for Jordan's well-being, but I really don't know how well she will take the reveal that this person she is slowly befriending is responsible for many of the bad things that happened to her. I'm still leaning more towards the forgiving side, but I'm not sure if Josie sees it similarly.
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
When you imagine the amount of traits that don't appear because the character was killed off early... you'll have a reason to believe that no one is safe.
Liquid makes a point.
[Run to the house.]
More hiding places. Plus Jerry would have taken any guns out that were in the barn.
He can't die. He still isn't a womanizer yet.
It's honestly just good to see everyone's returning even after my long absence. Although I've neglected this story for a while (and have pretty much abandoned the other two I didn't finish...), I plan to finish this one, however long it might take. No way I'm giving up on Monument.
People in trucks are always a bad sign. Especially when they drive like a convoy.
There's bound to be more of it. Besides, Jordan is on the edge, if something DOESN'T slip out sooner or later I'd be surprised. But what if its a choice? What if you get to choose? What then? I've heard to say you're leaning towards forgiveness, but I still what to know.
Woohoo, a new part! And don't be sorry for the delay, the awesomeness of this story is worth every second of waiting!
It isn't over un… moretil it's actually over
This is the best thing I've heard all day!
[Run to the house.]
He has to warn the others. I guess these trucks contain loads of Zafir people, which would be horrible, but even if they don't, I'm not exactly looking forward to meet people who drive around in trucks. Such people always mean trouble in a Zombie Apocalypse. If it is Zafir, then Jerry has to get the group out of there, since I am sure that not even the completely guiltless Josie and Dan will be safe from his wrath or worse. Oh shit, shit, shit, I'm extremely nervous for the group now.
Also:
It wasn’t who, or what, she thought it was.
This 'what' gives me a bad feeling...
By the way, I especially liked that interaction between Jordan and Josie, as short as it was. I can't wait until she l… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
(and have pretty much abandoned the other two I didn't finish...)
Wait... there are two you didn't finish? I remember the unfinished Fallout and the finished Raining, but have I missed one?
There's bound to be more of it. Besides, Jordan is on the edge, if something DOESN'T slip out sooner or later I'd be surprised.
Yeah, I noticed that. She's clearly tormenting herself with what she did and I'm pretty sure she can't keep it a secret much longer. From the way she acted in this part I was half expecting her to reveal her secret already. And it's clearly getting worse with her, when compared to her behaviour before Atlanta called her out on her actions.
But what if its a choice? What if you get to choose? What then? I've heard to say you're leaning towards forgiveness, but I still what to know.
It's hard for me to hate Jordan in personal, even though I'd love to. After all, I have to take her good deeds into account as well. She did not screw up out of malicious intent, or out of Ben-levels of stupidity, but because she did not know better. She did a lot of things to make up for it, especially by saving Josie and Lindsay from their kidnappers.
As I said a few parts ago, such a choice from Josie's PoV would be very hard for me to make. Every other group member has a very defined opinion on the topic, with Atlanta leaning towards the forgiving side, Ashley going to support Atlanta and Jerry very likely trying to murder her, but Josie is a bit of a wild card in that situation. Right now I'd choose to forgive Jordan, but I still don't know how Josie thinks about the kidnapping in particular. She's clearly haunted by the things that happened, but I'm not sure how much the abduction is actually affecting her over all the other stuff that happened, e.g. the death of her parents and especially the death of Anthony. I guess Anthony's death is tormenting her the most and from what we know so far Jordan had no involvement in drawing the horde closer towards Harvest Hills, meaning she's effectively innocent of that one.
I guess my ultimate decision will be heavily influenced by what Josie will think about the kidnapping in general and especially in the moment where Jordan reveals her involvement. A Josie-PoV right before the decision is to be made, in which she is particularly sympathetic or unsympathetic towards Jordan could probably matter in my ultimate decision a lot. Another factor that might be influencing my decision will be what Jordan is going to do until she reveals it. For example, if she saves Josie's life or helps her in some other way, I simply have to forgive her, but any action that harms Josie will obviously worsen my opinion on her. So, all in all I'm very torn and unsure how I will choose. It would be a very hard choice for sure, regardless of any consequence that might still follow as a result of Jordan's actions.
It's honestly just good to see everyone's returning even after my long absence. Although I've neglected this story for a while (and have pre… moretty much abandoned the other two I didn't finish...), I plan to finish this one, however long it might take. No way I'm giving up on Monument.
People in trucks are always a bad sign. Especially when they drive like a convoy.
There's bound to be more of it. Besides, Jordan is on the edge, if something DOESN'T slip out sooner or later I'd be surprised. But what if its a choice? What if you get to choose? What then? I've heard to say you're leaning towards forgiveness, but I still what to know.
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a h… moreult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“Y… [view original content]
(and have pretty much abandoned the other two I didn't finish...)
Wait... there are two you didn't finish? I remember the unfinished… more Fallout and the finished Raining, but have I missed one?
There's bound to be more of it. Besides, Jordan is on the edge, if something DOESN'T slip out sooner or later I'd be surprised.
Yeah, I noticed that. She's clearly tormenting herself with what she did and I'm pretty sure she can't keep it a secret much longer. From the way she acted in this part I was half expecting her to reveal her secret already. And it's clearly getting worse with her, when compared to her behaviour before Atlanta called her out on her actions.
But what if its a choice? What if you get to choose? What then? I've heard to say you're leaning towards forgiveness, but I still what to know.
It's hard for me to hate Jordan in personal, even though I'd love to. After all, I have to take her good deeds into … [view original content]
Let's see... it's been about ten days since I last posted in this thread. I'm sorry this isn't a part, but I'm going to start figuring out what comes next. Stay tuned.
Edit: I also wanted to add that I have ideas for a second story, but I'm not even in the planning stage of it. So if it solidifies you'll be the first to know about. (And just for clarity's sake, it will in no way halt this story more than it currently is. I'm just having a tough time getting back into writing at the moment.)
Voting is closed!
(!) Jerry will run into the house
Let's see... it's been about ten days since I last posted in this thread. I'm sorr… morey this isn't a part, but I'm going to start figuring out what comes next. Stay tuned.
Edit: I also wanted to add that I have ideas for a second story, but I'm not even in the planning stage of it. So if it solidifies you'll be the first to know about. (And just for clarity's sake, it will in no way halt this story more than it currently is. I'm just having a tough time getting back into writing at the moment.)
I've sort of been having personal problems. Part of the time I've been in a freaked out, panicked state. The reasons for this was pretty pointless and I'm not going to go into detail, but everything's fine. I'm fine, my family's fine. 99% a-okay. The whole reason I'm writing this is because I don't want to abandon this story for too long, but at the same time I simply haven't found the time. That is to say, I'm considering different options with this story and another. But again, let me emphasize this is NOT going to end until it's reached the end of its story.
With that being said, I'm also considering a second story. As I said before, it hadn't solidified, but I think I know what I want to do. It'll likely be a murder mystery of some kind. A twist-your-head-into-a-knot kind of murder mystery, too. So you can probably expect more news on that before long, and somewhat sadly, before any more news on Monument.
Edit: I'm honestly not sure how to continue Monument. I have planned plenty of stuff but I just don't know. This point is kinda odd, at the farmhouse, middle of nowhere, trucks coming up the hill... I just don't know how to continue. I've considered several options but I don't think any will be satisfactory. To explained what I mean... I've considered the whole 'waking up' plot point, but it just seems cheap. I need, and want, to take a step backwards but I don't currently have a way to do so that doesn't feel out of place.
And well, take all the time you need! I mean, of course I'm looking forward for the next part very much, but there are things that should always come first. Like any personal stuff for example. I don't intend to leave the forum in the foreseeable future, so I know I'll be around to read the next part as soon as you find the time and the inspiration to continue.
But again, let me emphasize this is NOT going to end until it's reached the end of its story.
Again, best thing I've heard all day. This is definitely one of my favourite ongoing stories here in the forum, so I'm really excited for how the storyline will continue.
I'm honestly not sure how to continue Monument. I have planned plenty of stuff but I just don't know.
I'm sure you will come up with a good way to continue the plot eventually. I know how hard it can be to continue a plotline if you don't have any idea how to resolve a certain situation. On a positive note, it sounds as if you've already planned the later episodes, which is never a bad thing. Take your time for that one, I'm sure I'm going to love whatever scenario you come up with. Well... except perhaps a plot in which all of our heroes die in the next part. But everything else is surely going to be awesome and worth any wait. Also, the longer the wait between the parts is, the longer is the time in which nothing terrible happens to Josie, which is great in itself
With that being said, I'm also considering a second story
These are awesome news too! There can never be such a thing as enough Hope stories, so I'm looking forward for that. And a murder mystery is always entertaining. Considering that the first story I've read from you was coincidentally a murder mystery, I am already hyped for it.
A somewhat quick update.
I've sort of been having personal problems. Part of the time I've been in a freaked out, panicked state. The rea… moresons for this was pretty pointless and I'm not going to go into detail, but everything's fine. I'm fine, my family's fine. 99% a-okay. The whole reason I'm writing this is because I don't want to abandon this story for too long, but at the same time I simply haven't found the time. That is to say, I'm considering different options with this story and another. But again, let me emphasize this is NOT going to end until it's reached the end of its story.
With that being said, I'm also considering a second story. As I said before, it hadn't solidified, but I think I know what I want to do. It'll likely be a murder mystery of some kind. A twist-your-head-into-a-knot kind of murder mystery, too. So you can probably expect more news on that before long, and somewhat sadly, before any more news on Monument.
… [view original content]
And, of course, I'll figure it out in time. I just don't want to ruin a perfectly good scenario with poorly thought out planning. Which... I've done in the past. But luckily, long as I put my mind to it, this story should live on to complete its (disturbingly depressing) purpose!
I might have jumped the gun on the murder mystery statement since I'm actually starting to consider something of a different genre entirely. I diffidently don't want to start two additional stories at the moment... but both options are becoming rather tempting. To make this easier I'll put up some kind of poll... soon...
I'm fine, my family's fine. 99% a-okay.
That is the most important thing. Good to hear
And well, take all the time you need! I m… moreean, of course I'm looking forward for the next part very much, but there are things that should always come first. Like any personal stuff for example. I don't intend to leave the forum in the foreseeable future, so I know I'll be around to read the next part as soon as you find the time and the inspiration to continue.
But again, let me emphasize this is NOT going to end until it's reached the end of its story.
Again, best thing I've heard all day. This is definitely one of my favourite ongoing stories here in the forum, so I'm really excited for how the storyline will continue.
I'm honestly not sure how to continue Monument. I have planned plenty of stuff but I just don't know.
I'm sure you will come up with a good way to continue the plot eventually. I know how hard it can … [view original content]
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more context for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of having experimented with, and written previous murder mystery-like stories - this story will be a lot easier with less of a learning-curve on my part.
Pirate Adventure Story: Much like any pirate themed adventure, story, tale, etc., this will take place at one of the seven seas with a crew of scurvy sea-dogs, made up from your submitted characters! I honestly don't want to spoil anything, though since I'm very (VERY) early in planning, I don't have much to spoil... but it will likely begin at the building (and/or gathering) of a ship and crew. It'll be quite the wild ride, and a fun one! But, sadly, it can't all be fun - I can't empathizes this enough - the learning-curve on this story will be massive and it will most likely take me awhile to get adjusted to the new genre, which will be evident in the writing, the poor, poor writing.
Last but not least it is time for another vote. I see now that using a online strawpoll would work in some settings and for different purposes, but this is probably a better question to ask onsite since I'd also like to, not only know who's voting for what, but also collect your opinions a little more directly. So, in classic fashion, here are your choices. (Submit you vote for a reply, and feel free to give a reason if you want to. Please and thank you!)
[A Mystery, please!] or [Pirate Adventure for thee!]
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more co… morentext for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of ha… [view original content]
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more co… morentext for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of ha… [view original content]
That it will, but going out on a limb and trying something new is FAR from a bad thing - it's no trouble to me trying to write something outside my own experience.
And, of course, your consideration is appreciated ^-^
possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death!
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more co… morentext for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of ha… [view original content]
That it will, but going out on a limb and trying something new is FAR from a bad thing - it's no trouble to me trying to write something outside my own experience.
And, of course, your consideration is appreciated ^-^
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more co… morentext for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of ha… [view original content]
Comments
Great stuff man! you don't have to worry about who's going to kill her, soon there'll be a new sheriff in town and justice will prevail once more
https://www.telltalegames.com/community/discussion/95205/the-20th-hunger-games
And I've now been reminded to upload a Domain chapter later today.
This line, right here:
Foreshadowing. And I see as a veiled reference to this:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ESxv3Em7wBw
Kenny is kind of like Jerry anyhow. Also, the reveal scene will probably be like Ben in Around Every Corner. That was a good succession of scenes.
Jack's gonna fuck shit up...
...In the unforeseeable future.
Chapter 3: “Sin” - South Texas - Part 5: “I Of The Storm”
Three hours down the road, the truck Jerry drove in front of the Rv came to a hult. And along with it, the RV. To their left was empty farmland and to the the right was a farm house. Steadily RV’s down fell open and Atlanta stepped outside. “Why are we stopping?” She questioned Jerry as he exited his truck and slammed the door shut behind him.
“I’m outta gas.” Jerry hissed with anger. Behind Atlanta came Josie, “we’re running low, too.” Josephine suggested, “but we could split the gas between the two?”
“It’s no use.” Jerry bluntly replied. “We’d just get ourselves stranded out in the middle of nowhere… More stranded than now.”
Ashley poked her head out of the RV. “Can we check out the house?” She asked.
Josephine turned her vision to the house. It sat about 20 meters away down a dirt road. To the right of the farmhouse was a red barn. “Let’s do that.” Josie agreed.
“You go on ahead…” Jerry said, “I’m gonna see if I can find gas in that barn. There’s bound to be something worth a damn.”
“C’mon, Dan!” Ashley called to the boy as she stepped out of the RV and began walking towards. “Can… Can I stay with Jordan?” Daniel asked while Sticking his head out of the RV.
Ashley and Atlanta stopped. There eyes crossed each others and Ashley called back, “C’mon, Daniel.” Ashley asked one again, more firmly this time. Dan lowered his head slightly and followed the couple quickly.
Jerry entered the Barn and Atlanta, Ashley and Daniel approached the house while Josephine remained outside the property with Jordan. “They’re checking out the Farmhouse and Barn, in case you wanted to know.” Josie informed Jordan as she stepped into the RV’s cabin, sooning sitting herself at the driver’s seat. “We haven’t talked much.” Josephine added.
“I guess not…” Jordan muttered in reply. “I, uh…” She trailed off, unable to continue talking.
“Are you okay?” Josephine questioned. “You don’t look like you’ve felt good. Well, I don’t blame anyone for not being comfortable in this state. But you and I haven’t had a single conversation that I can recall. Now that I think about it… I didn’t see you talk with anyone in the last ten days… other than… Christian.” She felt guilty for bringing up the missing young man. “I’m sorry, you know. I made the call to leave.”
“I…” Jordan stuttered, put-off by Josephine’s apaulogy. “I understand the choice you made...”
“Yeah, well…” Josephine scratched the back of her head and paused.
“I…” Jordan muttered. She felt her eyes growing watery. “I need to step out…” She said. And before Josephine could question her, she was out the door.
Jordan heard the dust and dirt crush and crumble beneath her boots as she looked for a place to walk. She raised her hand to her cheek and felt a warm tear roll across it. Every second her thought filled with what she had done. The pain she had caused. The problems she had created. The things that could have happen. All because of her, or lack of an attempt to stop it before it amassed into a larger problem. How could she attempt to hide her actions from the victim of them?
A second sound joined the mix as the sound of crunching gravel and dust followed her. She turned around to face this new sound. It wasn’t who, or what, she thought it was.
Jerry pulled stepped out of the Barn with a large, red can of gas in his hand. His vision fell upon the truck and Jordan who stood in front of it. He immediately sensed something was wrong, the look on Jordan’s face telled all.
He set the gas on the ground and his hand lowered to his pistol where he let his hand rest on it’s grip. Hey!” Jerry yelled to Jordan. Her head whipped around to the voice and she stared daggers at him. There was something wrong. Jordan didn’t risk yelling bac. Instead she ran into the RV and slammed the door shut. Jerry looked towards the Farmhouse with a worried look. “That was… odd,” he thought to himself. His vision drifted back towards the RV and he saw… it - a truck rolled down the road they came from, followed by another, and another...
It spelled trouble, through and through.
[Run to the house.]
[Run to the RV and truck.]
[Hide in the Barn.]
Okay, well, where to begin... I'm sorry, I guess. I haven't been actively posting nor have I kept up with others' stories. But I'm back for now. I'm back and I'm gonna keep writing for this.
It isn't over until it's actually over
[Hide in the Barn.]
Hide in the hay man.
[Run to the house.] I don't like where this is headed...
Great chapter!
[Run to the house.]
Awesome part!
Woohoo, a new part! And don't be sorry for the delay, the awesomeness of this story is worth every second of waiting!
This is the best thing I've heard all day!
[Run to the house.]
He has to warn the others. I guess these trucks contain loads of Zafir people, which would be horrible, but even if they don't, I'm not exactly looking forward to meet people who drive around in trucks. Such people always mean trouble in a Zombie Apocalypse. If it is Zafir, then Jerry has to get the group out of there, since I am sure that not even the completely guiltless Josie and Dan will be safe from his wrath or worse. Oh shit, shit, shit, I'm extremely nervous for the group now.
Also:
This 'what' gives me a bad feeling...
By the way, I especially liked that interaction between Jordan and Josie, as short as it was. I can't wait until she learns the truth, albeit I still have no idea how she will react. This small interaction showed that Josie apparently cares for Jordan's well-being, but I really don't know how well she will take the reveal that this person she is slowly befriending is responsible for many of the bad things that happened to her. I'm still leaning more towards the forgiving side, but I'm not sure if Josie sees it similarly.
Liquid makes a point.
[Run to the house.]
More hiding places. Plus Jerry would have taken any guns out that were in the barn.
He can't die. He still isn't a womanizer yet.
[Run to the house.]
[Run to the house.]
Wow this is great, I've just got back to reading this story and love it.
Not a sane person in the world would like where this is heading...
Thank you!
No hiding in the hay then, huh? Darn.
When you imagine the amount of traits that don't appear because the character was killed off early... you'll have a reason to believe that no one is safe.
Thank ya!
It's great to see you're still here! I hope I can keep you entertained through most of it!
It's honestly just good to see everyone's returning even after my long absence. Although I've neglected this story for a while (and have pretty much abandoned the other two I didn't finish...), I plan to finish this one, however long it might take. No way I'm giving up on Monument.
People in trucks are always a bad sign. Especially when they drive like a convoy.
There's bound to be more of it. Besides, Jordan is on the edge, if something DOESN'T slip out sooner or later I'd be surprised. But what if its a choice? What if you get to choose? What then? I've heard to say you're leaning towards forgiveness, but I still what to know.
Glad to see this back Hope! Very good part indeed.
[Run to the house]
Wait... there are two you didn't finish? I remember the unfinished Fallout and the finished Raining, but have I missed one?
Yeah, I noticed that. She's clearly tormenting herself with what she did and I'm pretty sure she can't keep it a secret much longer. From the way she acted in this part I was half expecting her to reveal her secret already. And it's clearly getting worse with her, when compared to her behaviour before Atlanta called her out on her actions.
It's hard for me to hate Jordan in personal, even though I'd love to. After all, I have to take her good deeds into account as well. She did not screw up out of malicious intent, or out of Ben-levels of stupidity, but because she did not know better. She did a lot of things to make up for it, especially by saving Josie and Lindsay from their kidnappers.
As I said a few parts ago, such a choice from Josie's PoV would be very hard for me to make. Every other group member has a very defined opinion on the topic, with Atlanta leaning towards the forgiving side, Ashley going to support Atlanta and Jerry very likely trying to murder her, but Josie is a bit of a wild card in that situation. Right now I'd choose to forgive Jordan, but I still don't know how Josie thinks about the kidnapping in particular. She's clearly haunted by the things that happened, but I'm not sure how much the abduction is actually affecting her over all the other stuff that happened, e.g. the death of her parents and especially the death of Anthony. I guess Anthony's death is tormenting her the most and from what we know so far Jordan had no involvement in drawing the horde closer towards Harvest Hills, meaning she's effectively innocent of that one.
I guess my ultimate decision will be heavily influenced by what Josie will think about the kidnapping in general and especially in the moment where Jordan reveals her involvement. A Josie-PoV right before the decision is to be made, in which she is particularly sympathetic or unsympathetic towards Jordan could probably matter in my ultimate decision a lot. Another factor that might be influencing my decision will be what Jordan is going to do until she reveals it. For example, if she saves Josie's life or helps her in some other way, I simply have to forgive her, but any action that harms Josie will obviously worsen my opinion on her. So, all in all I'm very torn and unsure how I will choose. It would be a very hard choice for sure, regardless of any consequence that might still follow as a result of Jordan's actions.
[Run to the house]
Great to see you back man!
[Run to the house.]
Great part! Good that this story is back
The mafia one he didn´t finish
Ah, you're right of course. How could I forget that one? That was such a great story!
[Run to the house.]
Voting is closed!
(!) Jerry will run into the house
Let's see... it's been about ten days since I last posted in this thread. I'm sorry this isn't a part, but I'm going to start figuring out what comes next. Stay tuned.
Edit: I also wanted to add that I have ideas for a second story, but I'm not even in the planning stage of it. So if it solidifies you'll be the first to know about. (And just for clarity's sake, it will in no way halt this story more than it currently is. I'm just having a tough time getting back into writing at the moment.)
great to hear! Cant wait for this to come back!
A somewhat quick update.
I've sort of been having personal problems. Part of the time I've been in a freaked out, panicked state. The reasons for this was pretty pointless and I'm not going to go into detail, but everything's fine. I'm fine, my family's fine. 99% a-okay. The whole reason I'm writing this is because I don't want to abandon this story for too long, but at the same time I simply haven't found the time. That is to say, I'm considering different options with this story and another. But again, let me emphasize this is NOT going to end until it's reached the end of its story.
With that being said, I'm also considering a second story. As I said before, it hadn't solidified, but I think I know what I want to do. It'll likely be a murder mystery of some kind. A twist-your-head-into-a-knot kind of murder mystery, too. So you can probably expect more news on that before long, and somewhat sadly, before any more news on Monument.
Edit: I'm honestly not sure how to continue Monument. I have planned plenty of stuff but I just don't know. This point is kinda odd, at the farmhouse, middle of nowhere, trucks coming up the hill... I just don't know how to continue. I've considered several options but I don't think any will be satisfactory. To explained what I mean... I've considered the whole 'waking up' plot point, but it just seems cheap. I need, and want, to take a step backwards but I don't currently have a way to do so that doesn't feel out of place.
That is the most important thing. Good to hear
And well, take all the time you need! I mean, of course I'm looking forward for the next part very much, but there are things that should always come first. Like any personal stuff for example. I don't intend to leave the forum in the foreseeable future, so I know I'll be around to read the next part as soon as you find the time and the inspiration to continue.
Again, best thing I've heard all day. This is definitely one of my favourite ongoing stories here in the forum, so I'm really excited for how the storyline will continue.
I'm sure you will come up with a good way to continue the plot eventually. I know how hard it can be to continue a plotline if you don't have any idea how to resolve a certain situation. On a positive note, it sounds as if you've already planned the later episodes, which is never a bad thing. Take your time for that one, I'm sure I'm going to love whatever scenario you come up with. Well... except perhaps a plot in which all of our heroes die in the next part. But everything else is surely going to be awesome and worth any wait. Also, the longer the wait between the parts is, the longer is the time in which nothing terrible happens to Josie, which is great in itself
These are awesome news too! There can never be such a thing as enough Hope stories, so I'm looking forward for that. And a murder mystery is always entertaining. Considering that the first story I've read from you was coincidentally a murder mystery, I am already hyped for it.
Aye! Thank you for the kind words, Liquid.
And, of course, I'll figure it out in time. I just don't want to ruin a perfectly good scenario with poorly thought out planning. Which... I've done in the past. But luckily, long as I put my mind to it, this story should live on to complete its (disturbingly depressing) purpose!
I might have jumped the gun on the murder mystery statement since I'm actually starting to consider something of a different genre entirely. I diffidently don't want to start two additional stories at the moment... but both options are becoming rather tempting. To make this easier I'll put up some kind of poll... soon...
Strawpoll removed to hopefully avoid any confusion
Alright, right now at least, the poll doesn't seem to be gaining anymore votes so I'll take a second to explain and provide a little more context for both options. In this case it settled relatively equally. 4/3. I don't want to simply go with the higher voted choice right now, since I'd rather not cut off the almost equal minority.
Mystery Story: Now to provide that context I briefly mentioned, starting with the 'mystery' option. As I've said, it'll be a mystery, most likely a murder mystery. Let me go right off the bat and say that this will not be your traditional slasher. It will instead be more of a mystery - possibly a sleepy, small town in a undecided location, where is this town things aren't as they seem... Missing people, strange cabins, mysterious lights, and the unconfirmed-possibility of death! All of this, and other things that are quite similar, are to be expected if this option is chosen. Not to mention the added plus of having experimented with, and written previous murder mystery-like stories - this story will be a lot easier with less of a learning-curve on my part.
Pirate Adventure Story: Much like any pirate themed adventure, story, tale, etc., this will take place at one of the seven seas with a crew of scurvy sea-dogs, made up from your submitted characters! I honestly don't want to spoil anything, though since I'm very (VERY) early in planning, I don't have much to spoil... but it will likely begin at the building (and/or gathering) of a ship and crew. It'll be quite the wild ride, and a fun one! But, sadly, it can't all be fun - I can't empathizes this enough - the learning-curve on this story will be massive and it will most likely take me awhile to get adjusted to the new genre, which will be evident in the writing, the poor, poor writing.
Last but not least it is time for another vote. I see now that using a online strawpoll would work in some settings and for different purposes, but this is probably a better question to ask onsite since I'd also like to, not only know who's voting for what, but also collect your opinions a little more directly. So, in classic fashion, here are your choices. (Submit you vote for a reply, and feel free to give a reason if you want to. Please and thank you!)
[A Mystery, please!] or [Pirate Adventure for thee!]
[Pirate Adventure for thee!]
[A Mystery, please!] just because it´s easier for you
That it will, but going out on a limb and trying something new is FAR from a bad thing - it's no trouble to me trying to write something outside my own experience.
And, of course, your consideration is appreciated ^-^
[A mystery, please!] I like mysteries.... Also...
This sounds like where i live...
Don't you mean going out on a peg?
[A Mystery, please!]
Eh, I dunno.
Yes.
I need to add more pirate puns to my vocabulary
Why not add dubloons to your chest?