What do you think the cure for self-centeredness is?
We see it all the time, people acting in a rude and selfish manner toward each other.
The days where respect and common courtesy where the order of the day, those days are gone pretty much. now we have a society, and I'm not just talking about here in the United States of America, I am talking about the world of mankind in general, were selfishness and "looking after number one", are the new order of the day.
Before I go any further, let me state for the record, that I am NOT trying to shove religion down your throat.
Rather, I am offering my honest appraisal of both the world today, and the answer to the question I posted.
Where we get most of our moral values is from God.
And for a detailed list of those values and principles, all one has to do is read the Gospel accounts, particularly Jesus Christ' famous Sermon on the Mount.
In there he outlined many timeless principles such as:
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."
"Love your neighbor as yourself."
"Love one another as I have loved you."
"Greater love hath no-one, than he who lays down his life for his friends."
The type of values that I just listed, and each one of them was spoken by Jesus, tell people to not just look out for themselves, but to also do good toward others, even when it is difficult to do so, and not just on any one particular day, but rather all 365 days a year.
And it doesn't get any more difficult than when a person's life is on the line!
The thing is, in order to have a successful society, you have to have a strong moral basis from which to draw conclusions from.
And religion, particularly the teachings of Christ, give people those types of values.
But they're no good if people do not apply them in their lives.
"Faith without works is dead."
And what's even worse, the people who are suppose to teach those principles to the masses, either do not do it at all, or they do it, but do not lead by example, and do not practice those principles themselves.
The point is, and I do believe this, that if everyone would follow those types of principles, that I think we would see an end to the selfish and self-centered attitude that is taking the world by storm today.
This is my personal appraisal of the world today.
And what I feel is the cure for selfishness.
But what about you?
What do you think the cure is?
Comments
I don't think religion is needed in order to teach selflessness. I think the problem is that we don't reward selflessness today in society. Doing something morally right results in your life being ruined, and doing something morally right only helps you if the right people notices it (what I mean is that being selfless only rewards you if the people noticing it want you to be rewarded). It's not often that you hear of kindness and good deeds resulting in the person's life changing for the better.
I believe that selfishness is an instinctive act that has to be fought in times of crisis. Like you said to me privately, people who you think would have your back would start to act only for themselves and they people they hold closest to them if it came down to who lived and died. In times like these, most people would have to fight this desire to abandon others for their own survival.
What I believe is that selflessness is meaningless and fake if it's forced. That's why I think it's an attitude to be learned and adopted by choice. Look at it this way: which scenario would make you more grateful? Someone saving your life because they were obligated to or because they chose to out of their own free will?
I think that being an egoist is being a child. It is adorable at an age of one year, somewhat frowned upon at the age of five, fully discouraged later. And immensely disgusting in a grown up.
Being selfish is treating the whole world as your loving mother (and by mother I mean a mother of a newly born child, not the loving relationship of grown child and his parents). If something goes not by the wishes of this person, he opens his mouth and cries loudly.
So the cure for selfishness is growing up, caring for yourself and for others, understanding that noone is obligated to put your needs before his own. And of course, everyone should treasure the unbelievably high level of cooperation means that mankind has achieved. One can but admire that.
Honestly, I wouldn't know the best answer to teach others to be more selfless. But my motto is to "learn to put your feet in other people's shoes", and know that the world does not revolve around just you but many other people as well, even those you don't even know.
Proceeds to shove religion down our throats.
Anyway, in my experience, there's little correlation between religion and selflessness. Many of the religious folks I know would rather pat themselves on the back for believing in God than lift a finger to help people.
I'm not convinced that we should be relying on moralistic arguments. In my experience, most people simply can't be reached that way.
I would tend to rely more on logical arguments. Like the idea that an equitable society is a safer society. If people feel like the rules are giving them a fair shake, they're far less likely to break them. Or we could just straight up incentivize selflessness. Give people tax breaks for volunteering.
I would be alive, so I think I would be very grateful. When I came home to find my house broken into, I went straight to the police station and a cop went through my house room by room making sure there was no one there. I was very grateful. I didn't care that it was required for him to get a paycheck. I also doubt that I would care that much if a firefighter saved me from a burning building. Maybe a random person doing it would be more deserving of credit, but someone doing it out of obligation is far from meaningless.
I'll take an insincere act of charity over a genuine act of apathy any day of the week.
Nvm, some explained it better than I could.
You can grow out of it. I was a little shit in my teenage years, but some personal events grew me the hell up pretty fast.
I think religion has nothing to do with it. Sure, plenty of people are humbled by religion, but plenty of other people are turned into self-righteous twats.
Yes, misquoting, but, 'do not focus on the mote in thy brothers eye before casting out the beam in thine own eye' 'let he who is without sin cast the first stone,' Great lessons everyone should follow.
That said, I tend to get my morals not from Jesus but largely from John Stuart Mill.
Not to mention we have sections of society where religious people are taught to see certain sexual proclivities being unnatural, despite having existed all throughout human history and present in a large number of other animals as well. *cough *
Basically, we can throw out the religious bathwater and keep the baby of empathy.
Omg, how did I miss that line. Clearly Bronn is the best character ever... Comparable only with Tyrion and The Dog.
Man, The Dog... He was my fav. I think of him everytime I go out to by a chicken.
Remember, we all have our own minds and bodies, so we're always self centered in a way. I think the answer you're looking for is to just be more charitable and compassionate and raise your children to be the same. And also have government enforce these values through policies, ads, and community programs in society and schools.
Religion is far from the solution. I've met so many self centered religious people.
The only "Cure" is a good environment. Sorry to anyone who takes offense to this but religion isn't always a great environment to grow up in or live in, sometimes it is but not all the time.
Very few things in this world irritate me more than being told morals stem from the bearded guy in the sky. My morals are not governed by an unknown deity that gave messages to a cult preacher in the land of sand some 2,000 years ago. I do not need a dusty book to tell me what is right and what is wrong. Did I need Jesus to tell me the golden rule? No, he's dead. I learned that from my preschool teacher. Did I need Jesus to tell me to love others? No, he's dead. My loving mother taught me that. We learn our morals from other people, good or bad, and when we reach an age where critical analysis is a possibility we can evaluate the morals we have been taught.
I posed this question to you in another thread, but I will ask again here: If you were to learn tomorrow that your god was not real would you view murder and theft as morally acceptable? Why wouldn't you? The answer is simple. . . because your empathy, sympathy, and compassion are not based on your holy book.
You proclaim selfishness is increasing. I do not agree. I haven't done any research, but I would venture to say selfless acts are more common now than ever. There will never be a complete eradication of selfishness for even the majority of seemingly selfless acts are rooted in selfish desires. That being said I think the best way to limit selfishness is to teach understanding and acceptance and to do away with the horrible aftertaste of religious crap shoved down the throats of the masses, starting with children.
I don't think there was ever a time in Human History that we weren't self centered. I think Religion has very little to do with fixing the selfish morality one has, (because people of religious and non-religious beliefs can be selfish and mean) or even fixing a entire generation or group of selfish people. I think that being self centered and selfish are two different things though. Self centered means focusing on oneself instead of everyone else, which I believe is fine. Some people can live with their pure focus of life on others, while some people need to find themselves moments where they can purely focus on themselves.
Downright selfishness is when you're unwilling to help others, be empathetic and kind to others and let yourself not be the center of attention 24/7.
Honestly, as a Christian, the way I see it, is that by saying that morality stems only from God's teachings/word and Christ's example is pushing people away. It's like saying, in order to be considered a good person you have to believe in God and abide by his principles. But here's the deal, people can be good people, kind and generous people without being believers in religion. Sure, there's certain things they won't adhere too like some religious people would, but that doesn't make them selfish bad people.
Selfishness can't be fixed. It's human nature. But that doesn't mean we shouldn't try to help others still. If you really want to get across to people to be better, be that example. Don't point and say my religion made me this way. Say you are a good person because you want to be, and if you feel that your religion helped to make you that way then great! I know a lot of people who have turned to Religion to make themselves better, because some people truly need that guidance.
I wrote an essay about the psychology of selfishness in school once and why I think it is an important and beneficial part of what makes us unique members of the human species. Once you understand the science behind it, you will start to realize that completely altruistic behaviour is simply not possible. Not only that, but it also denies how evolution has formed us to survive in society. Humans are naturally inclined to selfish behaviour. You can't help that, but you can use it differently.
Today, selfishness is considered synonymous with evil, but that's not true. Putting ourselves first is a survival instinct. Without it, we are left vulnerable and open to danger. Think of it this way: is a mother bear selfish for eating her cub if she is starving? Probably. Does she do it because she is cruel? No. She can always make more cubs, but the babies are nothing without their mother. In our ancestral days when we relied solely upon our fight or flight instincts to survive, if you were being chased by a hungry tiger, you would have likely tripped a member of your own tribe in order to get away. Now, obviously, we view such an act as barbaric and immoral, but back then it was simply a necessary evil if you wanted to survive.
From a purely psychological standpoint, acts of altruism are rarely if ever committed by a complete lack of self-interest. It's unfair, but true. Why do people give to charity? Why do they run marathons? Because it makes them feel good. It boosts their ego. And why is it that people diagnosed with psychopathy and sociopathy normally don't bother helping those in need? Put simply, it's because it doesn't satisfy them. This is not to say that we are incapable of selflessness to some degree, but it is in our blood to be self-serving. A term coined by Sigmund Freud is the Pleasure Principle - an instinct in the human mind that drives the id to seek out pleasure while avoiding pain. What this essentially means is exactly what it sounds like, we strive to obtain our most basic and primitive urges because if we do not, we become unsettled. Often, when these urges are not met, we turn to other means of getting them, usually through ways which sacrifice others in some form.
As a Christian, I do not believe that Christ is the cure for what evolution has designed us to be. No book or list of man-made rules can change the fact that, millions of years in the future, we are still animalistic and driven by instinct. We are more humane than we were. We have formed our own societal rules of what is acceptable and unacceptable and I believe wholeheartedly that most people are perfectly capable of deciding right from wrong. Humans are the only species on Earth who compete in a constant battle between our natural instincts and what society expects from us. Although selfishness cannot be "cured", we can strive to better our environment by using it the right way, as we do. There will be a few bad apples in the bunch, but their behaviour is not solely blamed on self-serving instincts, but rather other issues that should be dealt with accordingly.
There isn't a cure. In a way, everyone in the world is a little self-centered. Accept it, it's just how people are.
Everyone just needs to pay more attention to me, obviously.
Though seriously... does this not feel a little pedantic? I find it a bit hard to believe we are more self-centered at a time of unprecedented tolerance and an all time low rate of violent deaths globally. Are we perfect? Don't be silly. But we're doing a lot better than we ever have in human history.
You're talking about those who would identify politically as Conservative Republican.
Particuarly, Republicans who are Socially Conservative.
You might not like us, or more specifically, you might not like our beliefs.
But you do need to appreciate that we are entitled to their beliefs and express them, just as much as you're entitled to your beliefs and the expression of them.
That's what democracy is all about, the idea of being able to believe whatever you choose to believe, and express your beliefs and opinions, no matter if they're unpopular.
Of course, political correctness is destroying that!
Never heard of this Dog.
We all have to be a little self centered, if we were not, we wouldn't even provide for ourselves.
But when self centeredness is taken to an extreme, in where we are looking out for only ourselves and no-one else, that's a problem.
Sarangholic means the Hound, aka Sandor Clegane.
Cleganebowl
Yeah I know lol
Nobody is saying you shouldn't have the legal right not to say and think what you want, but discourse is predicated on the idea that both parties are presenting their arguements in good faith, ideally on the assumption that they are willing to alter their ideas based on new imput. It's not just two ships passing in the night, and it's not presenting your opinion, and then, the second anybody points out how it isn't logical or supported by evidence, turning around and saying 'well, I'm entitled to my opinion.'
Saying something is immoral is a value judgment. Saying it is unnatural when it is consistently present throughout time periods and in multiple species simply flies in the face of reality. That isn't political correctness, it's factual correctness.
If anything, speaking out too harshly against religion is politically incorrect. Could a self-avowed atheist become President in the current political climate? I very much doubt it. I doubt they would even be able to secure the Democratic Nomination, much less the Republican Nomination.
Uhm, you did see the first page, right?
Damn it
I don't think there is a cure for selfishness. Either you are born that way or not. I think the people you hang around with play a big part of who you become later in life. I wouldn't say religion because we all know those people who think they are "better people" because they go to church more often, or give more money on the tithe plate.
'I am NOT trying to shove religion down your throat.' .... 'Where we get most of our moral values is from God.'
I'd argue western morality owes more a debt to Greek philosophers - Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, et al - Than the Bible (or any religious tome).
The interpretation of religious texts (& the morality/social expectations) various tremendously depending on where you live on the planet.
For example, the western interpretation of the bible is often very different to those of African, Asian & Middle-Eastern Christians.
Different regions have different cultures, customs and social expectations from those experienced by westerners
Religion seems to adapt to the to these expectations/requirements a local culture more rather than define them - In part, I'd guess because the people in those areas are looking for different meaning in the text, but also to allowing greater integration into the respective cultures).
If social morality can be separated from religion - It makes the social obligations regional/communal.
Possibly making it easier to alter a regions (e.g. western) social practices (acting less selfishly).
Removing the problems from dealing with the many faiths (& the the different splinters of each faith) that operate in the world (or even just the west) today and attempting to coordinate them to a common moral action.
Sometimes the promise of cake works.
I wouldn't say were born selfish or not, I do agree on everything else though.
Oh man, I read that as "good government" and was about to down a couple bottles of bleach.
FTFY
I am so agreeing to this, if it wasn't for me actually putting up for altruistic behavior and manually/forcibly becoming selfless, I'd naturally (not natural as in syndromes/disorders) be selfish. Humans have grown and evolved to think deeper way deeper and complicated than mere fight or flight and whether there's a short or long term solution to a particular thing. The cure? Learn through experience and feelings accompanied by the specific situation(s) and that will help you decide. It's hard to just say "Ok, I wanna be selfless, so let me be selfless" not like that, no matter what, you have to experience and circumstances will shape you, if you do that, you're very likely to intrinsically change.
This doesn't just apply to selflessness, but also a lot of things.
Why do you say that?
Because humanity has never been worse.
Nope, although the government's actions can be part of the environment, it's far from the only solution.
Laugh out loud?
This is the best time to be alive since. . . ever. (Except for maybe the religious zealots, fancy that inverse correlation.)