Kenny is love, Kenny is life

I was only 9 years old

I loved Kenny so much, I had all the mullets and hats

I pray to Kenny every night before bed, thanking him for the life I've been given

"Kenny is love" I say; "Kenny is life"

My dad hears me and calls me a faggot

I know he was just jealous of my devotion for Kenny

I called him a cunt

He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep

I'm crying now, and my face hurts

I lay in bed and it's really cold

Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me

It's Kenny

I am so happy

He whispers into my ear "You're gonna ride my boat."

He grabs me with his powerful redneck hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees

I'm ready

I spread my ass-cheeks for Kenny

He penetrates my butt-hole

It hurts so much but I do it for Kenny

I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water

I push against his force

I want to please Kenny

He screeches something about boats and mustaches as he fills my butt with his love

My dad walks in

Kenny looks him straight in the eyes and says "Fuckin' urbans.''

Kenny leaves through my window

Kenny is love. Kenny is life.

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