“I’m going to need to do the talking, okay? I just don’t want anything messing up this deal… or anyone.” Petra is still a jerk.
“Hey, you all know Petra, my new super close friend. We’re super close now.” Jesse is an awesome protagonist. Minus one wrong!
“The spirit is willing… but the flesh is sad.” Axel’s best line.
“Man… you guys made one blip of a zombie.” Jesse references that one place when he/she should logically have no idea what that place is.
“All my secret deals feel off. It’s why I usually keep them a secret.” If you usually keep your secret deals a secret, then why make an exception in this case?
Suddenly Ivor.
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rides on this deal, perhaps you should try being less antagonistic.
Why not have one of you watch Ivor while the other one searches the chest?
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rode on that deal, perhaps you should have given them what they wanted so that this wouldn’t come back to bite later.
Cosplay is not an option at this convention.
“Hold all your questions until after the keynote.” “But the keynote’s sold out!” I thought conventions were a place to… you know, convene. Are tickets to this keynote really necessary?
Lukas… actually, he’s one of the best written characters Telltale has ever created. I’ll subtract a wrong from this counter, since I forgot to address him in the previous part.
The only catchphrase Jesse uses later on is “cool beans”, meaning you can only be “too cool for school” for this part of the episode.
Can you feel the heart pounding action packed chase ensue as Jesse wanders around, talks to friends, dances for a while, and… hold on, what were we doing again?
Aiden.
Jesse has to talk to the lady with poor fashion sense (dressed like Ivor) in order for Reuben to get kidnapped by the butcher so that Reuben can be mad at you for no good reason.
It’s a good thing Ivor turned around briefly to display an evil grin… at least, it would be if there were other people at this convention with poor fashion sense (dressed like Ivor).
So the only way to progress is by being a jerk to chickens, chicken fans, and people with chicken-phobias. Telltale games! All about the choices!
“There! Through that door!” Right through that one door with no security guarding it… and no one was curious enough to wander on through before?
“There are a million ways we can play this out.” Actually, there’s only one way you can play this out.
Wait- didn’t Petra have a sword earlier? If she and Jesse both have swords, then why keep the golden one?
“What the blip is all this stuff?” That’s twice Jesse references that other place. Why does Telltale have to validate itself with language so often?
Maybe you should grab that wither skull. If nothing else, you could still use it to trade for that diamond you were promised… or not.
“You thought you could screw us over and get away with it, didn’t you?” “We’re here to prove you wrong.” “What are you going to do about it? I have what I want ...” My point exactly.
Why didn’t Ivor have that golem built earlier? He might have had less people snooping around that way.
There’s not that much of an audience for the keynote. If you’re going to make a profit on those buying tickets, then why not include more openings for more lucrative results?
Going after Lukas while the others warn Gabriel makes the most sense, even if it’s not the safest option. I’ll even go one better: why not split up into actual groups, rather than have Jesse go alone (or, just with Reuben, I guess), for the best of both worlds?
“This can’t be good!” No kidding.
“This foul beast is no match for me!” Gabriel has seen the command block at work before, and should be familiar with at least some of its functions. Why, then, is he approaching the wither with only a diamond sword, if he knows that Ivor is using said command block?
“It’s after me, not you!” How do you know the wither is after you, unless you know that the creature is attracted to your amulet? If you know that it’s attracted to your amulet, then why give it to Jesse without so much as a warning?
“Creature, retreat!” Does the command block take vocal commands? I didn’t think so.
“Ivor, what are you doing?” I’d like to see you do better, Jesse. All you’ve done thus far is stand around and shout at people.
“blip chickens!” Jesse’s a jerk to chickens… again!
The choice to follow Gabriel’s company or to follow Jesse’s old friends barely affects anything. Why point out the available choices if none of them have much impact?
“Take this amulet, and guard it with your life!” Here! The McGuffin! Take it!
“Take it through the portal, and then…” And then…?
Petra, or Gabriel? This choice is about as plainly laid out before the player as that one choice in the first walking dead season. The only difference between the two is that this one gives you a choice between two genders of what is essentially the same character.
Axel is suddenly antagonistic to Lukas, and will be for a while to create drama.
(Jesse punches Ivor) (Minus one wrong)
“Why are we wasting time talking to this jerk?” Good question, Axel. Why are you still talking to Ivor?
“The girl! I saw her … While I was running toward the portal, I passed her. She was running in the opposite direction!” That makes no sense, if Petra gets sucked up in the wither storm’s tractor beam.
“Through that tunnel is a network of minecarts built by the Order of the Stone. It’s your only way out.” Why would you tell this to the people who ruined your revenge plan?
That was not an invisibility potion.
This minecart sequence… not the worst, but it does get old.
“Thanks for being so brave, Axel.” Hypocrisy.
Total Wrongs: 74
Sentence: An Amulet ("Take this amulet, and guard it with your life!")
Episode One (Part One):
Reading!
Narration!
I wanted to like the mouth animations, but after the novelty wears off they're just dis… moretracting.
People are expected to like Reuben because he's the protagonist's friend from the beginning. Same issue with Olivia and Axel.
"He kind of makes us look like... I don't know... amateurs." Whether or not you are amateurs does not depend on the company of one pig.
"I just don't want to give people one more reason to call us losers." If you hate being mocked so much, then why bother going to Endercon? It's not like you'll get to meet Gabriel or anything, since you didn't buy the tickets.
"You hear that?" "Oh no..." Unless you recognize the hissing, Axel's introduction doesn't have much impact.
Jump-scare.
"I brought you good times and now I'm being punished for it?" Good times must always instill fear.
"You brought Reuben a disguise?" Yes, because everyone will buy into the idea… [view original content]
(Please don't kill me) but the only thing wrong (if it even is wrong) is that, petra doesn't get sucked up at first, if you chose gabriel. She probably got saved by gabriel, and then got sucked up later on.
Episode One (Part Two):
“I’m going to need to do the talking, okay? I just don’t want anything messing up this deal… or anyone.” Petra is… more still a jerk.
“Hey, you all know Petra, my new super close friend. We’re super close now.” Jesse is an awesome protagonist. Minus one wrong!
“The spirit is willing… but the flesh is sad.” Axel’s best line.
“Man… you guys made one blip of a zombie.” Jesse references that one place when he/she should logically have no idea what that place is.
“All my secret deals feel off. It’s why I usually keep them a secret.” If you usually keep your secret deals a secret, then why make an exception in this case?
Suddenly Ivor.
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rides on this deal, perhaps you should try being less antagonistic.
Why not have one of you watch Ivor while the other one searches the chest?
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rode on that deal, p… [view original content]
At least choices matter here...
Oh! And main characters aren't killed off screen...
And the characters have emotions...
And you don… more't have superhuman strength as an 11-12 year old girl...
And the game's fans don't constantly sh*t on The Walking Dead for no reason...
I find them to be quite enjoyable actually. They have amazing views on the gaming industry and how big name companies are pretty much tearing it down, and the narrator is actually a neat guy.
Episode One (Part Two):
“I’m going to need to do the talking, okay? I just don’t want anything messing up this deal… or anyone.” Petra is… more still a jerk.
“Hey, you all know Petra, my new super close friend. We’re super close now.” Jesse is an awesome protagonist. Minus one wrong!
“The spirit is willing… but the flesh is sad.” Axel’s best line.
“Man… you guys made one blip of a zombie.” Jesse references that one place when he/she should logically have no idea what that place is.
“All my secret deals feel off. It’s why I usually keep them a secret.” If you usually keep your secret deals a secret, then why make an exception in this case?
Suddenly Ivor.
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rides on this deal, perhaps you should try being less antagonistic.
Why not have one of you watch Ivor while the other one searches the chest?
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rode on that deal, p… [view original content]
(Please don't kill me) but the only thing wrong (if it even is wrong) is that, petra doesn't get sucked up at first, if you chose gabriel. She probably got saved by gabriel, and then got sucked up later on.
Episode 1.
Opening Narration. ding.
"The prophecy, blah blah blah, exposition, blah blah blah, long ago, blah blah blah." cliche. I bo… moreught a game, not a Micheal Bay movie. Ding.
"Chicken-sized zombies". *ding."
"Zombie sized chickens." ding.
Aw hell, I'll take a sin off for Reuben's cuteness. shwoop.
Rocky style training montage AND quick time events? 12 sins to you! bring!
Everyone in the Ocelots are massive dicks except for Lucas, which is highly unlikely considering he's the leader of the group. ding.
Jackass Ocelot endangers EVERYONE AT THE CONTEST by breaking a block and releasing lava, yet he's NOT sent to prison? ding.
"Main protagonist (and pet) is in danger and are saved by vastly superior side character who we will be superior to later" cliche. ding.
Look, I get that diamonds are super rare and awesome, but Ivor is one sketchy dude. No matter how much you want the diamond, no rational human being would … [view original content]
Well, to Be Honest, Beyond deserves every hate it can get. It's Story is just bullshit. The only good thing about it, Are the actors. David Cage is imo a Pretty Bad writer.
Agree to disagree. I don't really feel that any of these channels are better than the other. Some have more content on offer, some are more efficient in their critiques, yet all have unique perspectives on gaming... IMO.
“I say we build a treehouse.” “That’ll take forever, and we’ll be exposed while we do it! We just need a quick and dirty hut!” The only real difference between these two choices is a difference in scenery.
“One for me, one for Olivia, one for Jesse… and one for Reuben.” Lukas rates just below pigs when it comes to Axel.
“Here, Lukas.” You give him a cookie, because he deserves a cookie.
“Did I do something to you? I’d really like to know, because you keep getting on my case for what seems like no reason.” Well, Telltale needed that element of drama found in their walking dead games, where people get mad at each other and run tensions high. It makes for good storytelling, apparently.
“You’re the only one wearing that stupid jacket. Don’t tell us what to do.” “Take… that… back.” Lukas is passionate about his fashion sense.
“Hey, guys. I, um… I picked some apples. You’re more than welcome to some if you want.” Apples bring friends together.
Considering how highly the Order of the Stone are thought of, it’s surprising that their abandoned temple was never converted into a tourist attraction.
What made that hissing noise?
Reuben has no sense of caution. It’s a wonder he wasn’t turned into ham a long time ago.
How does that pressure plate stay down?
It’s a good thing you have all the equipment to release the pressure plate. Otherwise, you’d be done for.
Also, that pressure plate is triggered when shot with an arrow… I don’t understand.
“The [insert team name]’s luck is changing.” Apart from a brief mention in episode four, this is the only time that the name Jesse picked will be used again.
If the Order of the Stone wanted Ivor’s exclusion to be kept a secret, then why leave a book describing their fight with the Ender Dragon lying around, out in the open, on the off chance that no one will ever find this place?
There was no map at Endercon… at least, not one that Jesse ever came across.
“…It’s the same as the amulet.” No kidding.
This puzzle is the only brain-bender in this episode… or maybe I should mark it because it’s a brain-bender in this episode… either way.
“How did they build this?” Good question.
“Look, we don’t know enough about how this thing works. Maybe the amulet only tracks them when they’re on the surface, or maybe it doesn’t work when they’re in the Nether.” You’ve practically said the same thing twice.
Magnus, or Elleguard? The consequences of this choice mark the first time Telltale has offered two drastically different environments and gameplay themes to start out a follow-up episode with… and I think that’s awesome. Minus one wrong!
Episode One (Part One):
Reading!
Narration!
I wanted to like the mouth animations, but after the novelty wears off they're just dis… moretracting.
People are expected to like Reuben because he's the protagonist's friend from the beginning. Same issue with Olivia and Axel.
"He kind of makes us look like... I don't know... amateurs." Whether or not you are amateurs does not depend on the company of one pig.
"I just don't want to give people one more reason to call us losers." If you hate being mocked so much, then why bother going to Endercon? It's not like you'll get to meet Gabriel or anything, since you didn't buy the tickets.
"You hear that?" "Oh no..." Unless you recognize the hissing, Axel's introduction doesn't have much impact.
Jump-scare.
"I brought you good times and now I'm being punished for it?" Good times must always instill fear.
"You brought Reuben a disguise?" Yes, because everyone will buy into the idea… [view original content]
Well, to Be Honest, Beyond deserves every hate it can get. It's Story is just bullshit. The only good thing about it, Are the actors. David Cage is imo a Pretty Bad writer.
Episode One (Part Three):
“I say we build a treehouse.” “That’ll take forever, and we’ll be exposed while we do it! We just need a quick … moreand dirty hut!” The only real difference between these two choices is a difference in scenery.
“One for me, one for Olivia, one for Jesse… and one for Reuben.” Lukas rates just below pigs when it comes to Axel.
“Here, Lukas.” You give him a cookie, because he deserves a cookie.
“Did I do something to you? I’d really like to know, because you keep getting on my case for what seems like no reason.” Well, Telltale needed that element of drama found in their walking dead games, where people get mad at each other and run tensions high. It makes for good storytelling, apparently.
“You’re the only one wearing that stupid jacket. Don’t tell us what to do.” “Take… that… back.” Lukas is passionate about his fashion sense.
“Hey, guys. I, um… I picked some apples. You’re more than welcome to some if yo… [view original content]
People get hungry in this world, but do they need to poop? o.o where's the Minecraft toilet? Do the ladies get periods? Do men need to shave? Where are all the Minecraft children? Do people woo hoo and the expecting mother pops out a baby in 9 months, or do they just pop out of the ground like daisies fully grown and mentally matured without the need for a woo hoo? Are there even families? Do people fall in love? Do people get into relationships or get married or is everybody asexual?
Do they need planning permission first before building a structure, or do they need to pass a builder exam to get a builder's licence first before even applying for that? Do they need to study? Are there schools or colleges? What's stopping somebody from building a 1000 foot high giant block of dirt? Is it against the law? Will they go to prison for destroying the countryside by removing all the dirt and building it on a town because they thought 'hey, i'm want to build a giant block of dirt here' and made it so? W-Why aren't there large sculptures of Breaking Bad Characters and Pokemon everywhere if people can build whatever they want?
How do they pick anything up or build to begin with if they have no fingers?
How do they store the infinite amount of items with no pockets?
W-Why is everything made of blocks!? T___T HOW ARE THEY EVEN ALIIIIIVE!?
Those are some good questions, and the most logical answer to all of them is that reasons, reasons, reasons, that's why reasons do reasons, and why is the world blocky you ask? Well, because reasons and reasons with reasons. I hope you understood, i know it's really dramatic, but it's true, i'm sorry.
People get hungry in this world, but do they need to poop? o.o where's the Minecraft toilet? Do the ladies get periods? Do men need to shave… more? Where are all the Minecraft children? Do people woo hoo and the expecting mother pops out a baby in 9 months, or do they just pop out of the ground like daisies fully grown and mentally matured without the need for a woo hoo? Are there even families? Do people fall in love? Do people get into relationships or get married or is everybody asexual?
Do they need planning permission first before building a structure, or do they need to pass a builder exam to get a builder's licence first before even applying for that? Do they need to study? Are there schools or colleges? What's stopping somebody from building a 1000 foot high giant block of dirt? Is it against the law? Will they go to prison for destroying the countryside by removing all the dirt and building it on a town because they thought 'hey, i'm wa… [view original content]
People get hungry in this world, but do they need to poop? o.o where's the Minecraft toilet? Do the ladies get periods? Do men need to shave… more? Where are all the Minecraft children? Do people woo hoo and the expecting mother pops out a baby in 9 months, or do they just pop out of the ground like daisies fully grown and mentally matured without the need for a woo hoo? Are there even families? Do people fall in love? Do people get into relationships or get married or is everybody asexual?
Do they need planning permission first before building a structure, or do they need to pass a builder exam to get a builder's licence first before even applying for that? Do they need to study? Are there schools or colleges? What's stopping somebody from building a 1000 foot high giant block of dirt? Is it against the law? Will they go to prison for destroying the countryside by removing all the dirt and building it on a town because they thought 'hey, i'm wa… [view original content]
Episode One (Part Two):
“I’m going to need to do the talking, okay? I just don’t want anything messing up this deal… or anyone.” Petra is… more still a jerk.
“Hey, you all know Petra, my new super close friend. We’re super close now.” Jesse is an awesome protagonist. Minus one wrong!
“The spirit is willing… but the flesh is sad.” Axel’s best line.
“Man… you guys made one blip of a zombie.” Jesse references that one place when he/she should logically have no idea what that place is.
“All my secret deals feel off. It’s why I usually keep them a secret.” If you usually keep your secret deals a secret, then why make an exception in this case?
Suddenly Ivor.
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rides on this deal, perhaps you should try being less antagonistic.
Why not have one of you watch Ivor while the other one searches the chest?
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rode on that deal, p… [view original content]
Episode One (Part One):
Reading!
Narration!
I wanted to like the mouth animations, but after the novelty wears off they're just dis… moretracting.
People are expected to like Reuben because he's the protagonist's friend from the beginning. Same issue with Olivia and Axel.
"He kind of makes us look like... I don't know... amateurs." Whether or not you are amateurs does not depend on the company of one pig.
"I just don't want to give people one more reason to call us losers." If you hate being mocked so much, then why bother going to Endercon? It's not like you'll get to meet Gabriel or anything, since you didn't buy the tickets.
"You hear that?" "Oh no..." Unless you recognize the hissing, Axel's introduction doesn't have much impact.
Jump-scare.
"I brought you good times and now I'm being punished for it?" Good times must always instill fear.
"You brought Reuben a disguise?" Yes, because everyone will buy into the idea… [view original content]
Comments
Alright this is like the 50th time you've posted that no need to keep yelling your opinion
Leonardo deserved his oscar
I don't understand, what are you saying? What can't be broken?
Yes, yes, we all get the irony of your name by now...
hahahahaahahahahahahahaha
When almost every reviewer gives you five stars you know you are ready for a Oscar.
Oh my god, we all get it. You hate this game.
[removed]
[removed]
Episode One (Part Two):
“I’m going to need to do the talking, okay? I just don’t want anything messing up this deal… or anyone.” Petra is still a jerk.
“Hey, you all know Petra, my new super close friend. We’re super close now.” Jesse is an awesome protagonist. Minus one wrong!
“The spirit is willing… but the flesh is sad.” Axel’s best line.
“Man… you guys made one blip of a zombie.” Jesse references that one place when he/she should logically have no idea what that place is.
“All my secret deals feel off. It’s why I usually keep them a secret.” If you usually keep your secret deals a secret, then why make an exception in this case?
Suddenly Ivor.
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rides on this deal, perhaps you should try being less antagonistic.
Why not have one of you watch Ivor while the other one searches the chest?
You know, Ivor? Considering how much your revenge plan rode on that deal, perhaps you should have given them what they wanted so that this wouldn’t come back to bite later.
Cosplay is not an option at this convention.
“Hold all your questions until after the keynote.” “But the keynote’s sold out!” I thought conventions were a place to… you know, convene. Are tickets to this keynote really necessary?
Lukas… actually, he’s one of the best written characters Telltale has ever created. I’ll subtract a wrong from this counter, since I forgot to address him in the previous part.
The only catchphrase Jesse uses later on is “cool beans”, meaning you can only be “too cool for school” for this part of the episode.
Can you feel the heart pounding action packed chase ensue as Jesse wanders around, talks to friends, dances for a while, and… hold on, what were we doing again?
Aiden.
Jesse has to talk to the lady with poor fashion sense (dressed like Ivor) in order for Reuben to get kidnapped by the butcher so that Reuben can be mad at you for no good reason.
It’s a good thing Ivor turned around briefly to display an evil grin… at least, it would be if there were other people at this convention with poor fashion sense (dressed like Ivor).
So the only way to progress is by being a jerk to chickens, chicken fans, and people with chicken-phobias. Telltale games! All about the choices!
“There! Through that door!” Right through that one door with no security guarding it… and no one was curious enough to wander on through before?
“There are a million ways we can play this out.” Actually, there’s only one way you can play this out.
Wait- didn’t Petra have a sword earlier? If she and Jesse both have swords, then why keep the golden one?
“What the blip is all this stuff?” That’s twice Jesse references that other place. Why does Telltale have to validate itself with language so often?
Maybe you should grab that wither skull. If nothing else, you could still use it to trade for that diamond you were promised… or not.
“You thought you could screw us over and get away with it, didn’t you?” “We’re here to prove you wrong.” “What are you going to do about it? I have what I want ...” My point exactly.
Why didn’t Ivor have that golem built earlier? He might have had less people snooping around that way.
There’s not that much of an audience for the keynote. If you’re going to make a profit on those buying tickets, then why not include more openings for more lucrative results?
Going after Lukas while the others warn Gabriel makes the most sense, even if it’s not the safest option. I’ll even go one better: why not split up into actual groups, rather than have Jesse go alone (or, just with Reuben, I guess), for the best of both worlds?
“This can’t be good!” No kidding.
“This foul beast is no match for me!” Gabriel has seen the command block at work before, and should be familiar with at least some of its functions. Why, then, is he approaching the wither with only a diamond sword, if he knows that Ivor is using said command block?
“It’s after me, not you!” How do you know the wither is after you, unless you know that the creature is attracted to your amulet? If you know that it’s attracted to your amulet, then why give it to Jesse without so much as a warning?
“Creature, retreat!” Does the command block take vocal commands? I didn’t think so.
“Ivor, what are you doing?” I’d like to see you do better, Jesse. All you’ve done thus far is stand around and shout at people.
“blip chickens!” Jesse’s a jerk to chickens… again!
The choice to follow Gabriel’s company or to follow Jesse’s old friends barely affects anything. Why point out the available choices if none of them have much impact?
“Take this amulet, and guard it with your life!” Here! The McGuffin! Take it!
“Take it through the portal, and then…” And then…?
Petra, or Gabriel? This choice is about as plainly laid out before the player as that one choice in the first walking dead season. The only difference between the two is that this one gives you a choice between two genders of what is essentially the same character.
Axel is suddenly antagonistic to Lukas, and will be for a while to create drama.
(Jesse punches Ivor) (Minus one wrong)
“Why are we wasting time talking to this jerk?” Good question, Axel. Why are you still talking to Ivor?
“The girl! I saw her … While I was running toward the portal, I passed her. She was running in the opposite direction!” That makes no sense, if Petra gets sucked up in the wither storm’s tractor beam.
“Through that tunnel is a network of minecarts built by the Order of the Stone. It’s your only way out.” Why would you tell this to the people who ruined your revenge plan?
That was not an invisibility potion.
This minecart sequence… not the worst, but it does get old.
“Thanks for being so brave, Axel.” Hypocrisy.
Total Wrongs: 74
Sentence: An Amulet ("Take this amulet, and guard it with your life!")
The whole game is idiotic compared to the walking dead
XD
(Please don't kill me) but the only thing wrong (if it even is wrong) is that, petra doesn't get sucked up at first, if you chose gabriel. She probably got saved by gabriel, and then got sucked up later on.
Ok.
Thank you for appreciating it.
Well actually I was being extremely sarcastic, but whatever helps you sleep at night.
At least choices matter here...
Oh! And main characters aren't killed off screen...
And the characters have emotions...
And you don't have superhuman strength as an 11-12 year old girl...
And the game's fans don't constantly sh*t on The Walking Dead for no reason...
He doesn't sleep.
GCN is terrible.
It was a metaphor.
This
I find them to be quite enjoyable actually. They have amazing views on the gaming industry and how big name companies are pretty much tearing it down, and the narrator is actually a neat guy.
Yeah, Ivor wasn't very ...efficient as a villain.
Just one diamond and he could've avoided all that extra attention.
That's fair- I'd still count it, either way. :P
Have to agree here. Their attempt at "comedy" is pitiful and their video on Beyond 2 Souls was God awful all they did was shit on the game
[removed]
I find it awesome that your count is 23, when mine is 74 and counting. X) Anyhow, excited for your take on the fourth episode!
Well, to Be Honest, Beyond deserves every hate it can get. It's Story is just bullshit. The only good thing about it, Are the actors. David Cage is imo a Pretty Bad writer.
Agree to disagree. I don't really feel that any of these channels are better than the other. Some have more content on offer, some are more efficient in their critiques, yet all have unique perspectives on gaming... IMO.
Episode One (Part Three):
“I say we build a treehouse.” “That’ll take forever, and we’ll be exposed while we do it! We just need a quick and dirty hut!” The only real difference between these two choices is a difference in scenery.
“One for me, one for Olivia, one for Jesse… and one for Reuben.” Lukas rates just below pigs when it comes to Axel.
“Here, Lukas.” You give him a cookie, because he deserves a cookie.
“Did I do something to you? I’d really like to know, because you keep getting on my case for what seems like no reason.” Well, Telltale needed that element of drama found in their walking dead games, where people get mad at each other and run tensions high. It makes for good storytelling, apparently.
“You’re the only one wearing that stupid jacket. Don’t tell us what to do.” “Take… that… back.” Lukas is passionate about his fashion sense.
“Hey, guys. I, um… I picked some apples. You’re more than welcome to some if you want.” Apples bring friends together.
Considering how highly the Order of the Stone are thought of, it’s surprising that their abandoned temple was never converted into a tourist attraction.
What made that hissing noise?
Reuben has no sense of caution. It’s a wonder he wasn’t turned into ham a long time ago.
How does that pressure plate stay down?
It’s a good thing you have all the equipment to release the pressure plate. Otherwise, you’d be done for.
Also, that pressure plate is triggered when shot with an arrow… I don’t understand.
“The [insert team name]’s luck is changing.” Apart from a brief mention in episode four, this is the only time that the name Jesse picked will be used again.
If the Order of the Stone wanted Ivor’s exclusion to be kept a secret, then why leave a book describing their fight with the Ender Dragon lying around, out in the open, on the off chance that no one will ever find this place?
There was no map at Endercon… at least, not one that Jesse ever came across.
“…It’s the same as the amulet.” No kidding.
This puzzle is the only brain-bender in this episode… or maybe I should mark it because it’s a brain-bender in this episode… either way.
“How did they build this?” Good question.
“Look, we don’t know enough about how this thing works. Maybe the amulet only tracks them when they’re on the surface, or maybe it doesn’t work when they’re in the Nether.” You’ve practically said the same thing twice.
Magnus, or Elleguard? The consequences of this choice mark the first time Telltale has offered two drastically different environments and gameplay themes to start out a follow-up episode with… and I think that’s awesome. Minus one wrong!
Total Wrongs: 92
Sentence: A Message from Axel ("I have cookies.")
I disagree however, feelings aside the review was mostly purely shitting on the game rather than providing any intelligent or legitimate criticism
Well, that is the Definition of nitpicking. It's what they Do. nitpicking in a humorous way.
True dat.
Poor guy.
Yeah I agree. They really are a poor mans Cinemasins.
People get hungry in this world, but do they need to poop? o.o where's the Minecraft toilet? Do the ladies get periods? Do men need to shave? Where are all the Minecraft children? Do people woo hoo and the expecting mother pops out a baby in 9 months, or do they just pop out of the ground like daisies fully grown and mentally matured without the need for a woo hoo? Are there even families? Do people fall in love? Do people get into relationships or get married or is everybody asexual?
Do they need planning permission first before building a structure, or do they need to pass a builder exam to get a builder's licence first before even applying for that? Do they need to study? Are there schools or colleges? What's stopping somebody from building a 1000 foot high giant block of dirt? Is it against the law? Will they go to prison for destroying the countryside by removing all the dirt and building it on a town because they thought 'hey, i'm want to build a giant block of dirt here' and made it so? W-Why aren't there large sculptures of Breaking Bad Characters and Pokemon everywhere if people can build whatever they want?
How do they pick anything up or build to begin with if they have no fingers?
How do they store the infinite amount of items with no pockets?
W-Why is everything made of blocks!? T___T HOW ARE THEY EVEN ALIIIIIVE!?
Those are some good questions, and the most logical answer to all of them is that reasons, reasons, reasons, that's why reasons do reasons, and why is the world blocky you ask? Well, because reasons and reasons with reasons. I hope you understood, i know it's really dramatic, but it's true, i'm sorry.
That got way too real way too fast
Ikr
Nice list, but I'm curious: there's been no swearing in this game, so what are you blipping out?
Cool list, I have another.
That's a great prank Axel, but since creepers can't climb ladders, we know one isn't lurking just below the trapdoor to your treehouse.