Fez's monolith puzzle is insane. I thought I was a bastard. I have all new respect for Phil Fish for coming up with possibly the most nearly-impossible puzzle ever conceived. A puzzle that took thousands of people, brute force, and serious code breaking skills to accomplish.
Been unusally open on Good Old Games, and I've been talking to a fellow brit on there.
He seems quite a lot like me, personality wise, though there are some key differences.
What is most interesting though, is that my odd behaviour quirks seem to be related to his, and I may have a Social Anxiety Disorder.
"Generalized social anxiety disorder typically involves a persistent, intense, chronic fear of being judged by others and of being embarrassed or humiliated by one's own actions. These fears can be triggered by perceived or actual scrutiny from others. While the fear of social interaction may be recognized by the person as excessive or unreasonable, overcoming it can be quite difficult"
Though I don't seem to display many physical symptoms.
(I have had panic attacks before though. But under very extreme circumstances)
I do display the characteristics assosicated with it.
"In cognitive models of social anxiety disorder, social phobics experience dread over how they will be presented to others. They may be overly self-conscious, pay high self-attention after the activity, or have high performance standards for themselves. According to the social psychology theory of self-presentation, a sufferer attempts to create a well-mannered impression on others but believes he or she is unable to do so. Many times, prior to the potentially anxiety-provoking social situation, sufferers may deliberately go over what could go wrong and how to deal with each unexpected case.After the event, they may have the perception they performed unsatisfactorily. Consequently, they will review anything that may have possibly been abnormal or embarrassing. These thoughts do not just terminate soon after the encounter, but may extend for weeks or longer.[10] Those with social phobia tend to interpret neutral or ambiguous conversations with a negative outlook and many studies suggest that socially anxious individuals remember more negative memories than those less distressed.[9]
An example of an instance may be that of an employee presenting to his co-workers. During the presentation, the person may stutter a word, upon which he or she may worry that other people significantly noticed and think that their perceptions of him or her as a presenter have been tarnished. This cognitive thought propels further anxiety which compounds with further stuttering, sweating, and, potentially, a panic attack"
I don't stutter or anything, but I do worry. (I would worry I cocked things up in that situation, maybe not as bad as that example but the lingering though may be there)
Blushing I have done before, but the "fight-or-flight" symptoms don't kick in as bad as the article describes it.
(Maybe I have more control over it)
Barring that, the article describes me fairly spot-on.
Possibly this could be causing my inability to act lately.
I'm afraid to persue either option, (uni or going it alone) because I am afraid of failure and embarassment.
Hmmm... this might be more serious than I first thought...
EDIT: Look! I'm doing it right now.
Going back and editing posts, because I'm afriad people are going to see this as a wall of text.
It's one thing to acknowledge that He does not choose to exert direct control over certain things in our lives. But it is another to assume that because He does not then He must not exist.
I'm just saying that the objectively observable reality in place is entirely consistent with what one would expect from a universe that wasn't governed by a deity or other outside force. I'm not the one who walked into a conversation with assertions of objective truth.
I found that show(first 3 seasons that i actually watched anyway) rather entertaining. Granted, I AM the demographic and know almost all the references.
I found that show(first 3 seasons that i actually watched anyway) rather entertaining. Granted, I AM the demographic and know almost all the references.
I think there are 5 seasons, and 3 Star Wars Specials, (unlike the Family Guy ones, (which are well produced and good for a watch or two), they are actually REALLY, REALLY, funny! ).
I feel like a complete asshole. My relationship of 5 years turned into a long term one 3 years ago. She is in the States with two kids and slowly bit by bit I stopped believing. I just told her tonight that I just don't believe we will ever be together and ended it. The problem? She was otherwise very good to me and devoted and I, the same. The only problem was I stopped believing. I know that any of my friends would say "3 years?!?! give it up", but I still feel like the bad guy here and I'm the one who is wrong.
I feel like a complete asshole. My relationship of 5 years turned into a long term one 3 years ago. She is in the States with two kids and slowly bit by bit I stopped believing. I just told her tonight that I just don't believe we will ever be together and ended it. The problem? She was otherwise very good to me and devoted and I, the same. The only problem was I stopped believing. I know that any of my friends would say "3 years?!?! give it up", but I still feel like the bad guy here and I'm the one who is wrong.
Really sorry to hear that, Johro. A long-term relationship ending is rarely easy, even when you're the instigator and certain that it's no longer working. Probably even more difficult where there are kids involved.
I can't imagine doing long distance for years with no end in sight. You shouldn't feel like the bad guy, a 3-year effort is more than anyone should ask for. In that time a 6 year old kid grows into a 9 year old kid... that is a LOT to miss out on.
Don't feel bad for wanting to have a partner and family you get to see and snuggle every day. No matter how good and devoted you are to each other, there's no way to replace that.
I'm just saying that the objectively observable reality in place is entirely consistent with what one would expect from a universe that wasn't governed by a deity or other outside force. I'm not the one who walked into a conversation with assertions of objective truth.
Observation of reality, by its very nature, is subjective to some degree and from our extremely limited perspective there is not enough scientific data to support the lack of the existence of God.
To assume that either the scientific method provides all the answers, or else that any answers not obtainable by same are worthless in knowing are, in my opinion, silly notions to have. Almost as silly as to assume that the universe and everything in it, with their complexity and intricacy, occurred entirely by random happenstance.
I would say it would be more like complex random happenstance. Kinda like a really stupid mouse running through a maze. Universe ran into every dead end on the way to getting to where we are now. And it took a long time to run into all those dead ends.
Ok, so I talked to my mother about it, (which was hard to do. Its sounds to simple but I was pacing around, eating random crap, trembling, in tears over it, struggling to actually SAY something about it), and I think she might have understood a bit of it, but again, its difficult for many people to understand what I'm going through if they never had that problem.
At first she was just saying "oh its nothing, you'll be alright", but once she realised I was being serious she listened.
(And gave me loads of encouragement. Encouragement I was struggling to accept)
The more I talk to people about it, the more I'm convinced I need help in dealing with this.
I need a way to get my thoughts out in the open. For me to actually SAY it, (its so much easier to type stuff since there is little to no fear of reprocussion), instead of keeping all this bottled up.
I think I may just go to the GP and try to get referred to a psychiatrist (the NHS does cover psychiatry, but you have to go through a GP first), to help me deal with this social anxiety before it gets any worse.
(Though me actually doing that is going to be hard. I know I'm going to try to find ways to get myself out of it, to convince myself I don't need to do it, but I HAVE to override that. Thats the exact problem. Fear and Doubt, my mortal nemesis! XD)
I genuinely think now its getting in my way.
I mean a part of me is already reacting over this. Trying to convince myself I'm just being a hypochondriac, that its all a waste of time, but again, thats exactly the problem.
A part of me is trying at all costs to avoid confrontation. The fear of social and personal embarassment.
I've made some progress in dealing with it, but its not enough.
I may have learned to stand up to my brother, but he can still manipulate my fear into getting what he wants, (man that guys is a total asshole! >:/), and I may be able to talk to people in safer environments, like work or in a classroom, but I fear trust, I fear betrayal.
I don't connect to people like I know I can do.
At work, I keep people at arm's length. Nice people too. I worry that they are going to reject me. Hell there are some nerdy people working there, and everytime they talk, I just want to jump in and join their conversation. But I never do.
The words are on the tip of my tongue, but they never escape my mouth.
I fear I'm going to be rude, I fear they are going to be like WTF? and laugh at me. I fear I might get into an argument, or become a target.
You see ^ I have to deal with that every day, with every decision.
Did you know that on my trips to uni, I do two things all the time.
1. I constantly check my stuff to see if I have lost anything, or had something stolen,
(related to past experiences with both)
Like every 10 mins if I'm dozing off.
I doze off. I wake up in shock. I check my bag for my laptop, my pockets for my phone, and my wallet for my bus ticket.
2. When I'm at uni I'm afraid of exposing ANY skin around the waist.
I'm contantly pulling my shirt or jacket down. Checking, and rechecking I've got everything covered.
(I think this is related to past experience as well)
Everytime I got to the loo, I check like 3 or 4 times my fly is done up, and my belt is secure.
(again, related to past experience)
Its irrational fears like this, that are debilitating me.
I should excel at uni, but I'm afriad of trying to do any work, because I fear failure.
I won't decide between uni and work, because either one I fear makes me look like a failure.
(Failing to persue my dreams, failing to take control, failing to fail at uni, worried society will see me as a loser, a failure)
So I never get any work done, on either side, because I'm worried about the other side.
I procrastinate, I go do something else to take my mind of it.
Its irrational, its the source of my lack of focus, and I need help in dealing with that. I realise that now.
Somehow I have to maintain enough control to confront this. I can't back off, and run away. If I do, then how am I ever going to get anywhere in life.
(Struggling to keep my self-loathing from activating now. Damn my mind! Its my worse enemy of all. I know I'm a good person, possibly even a great person. A smart person, but gosh darn it, I can hate myself so much.)
EDIT: Oh yeah another thing I always do.
When going to the bathroom I always avoid the urinal. Go straight for the cubicle.
Even if I have to wait for it, even when I just need a quick wee, even if it stinks I'll go to it.
Oh, and if its taking too long. I just go to another bathroom, even if its on another floor or the other side of a building.
Heh. Lets get another example off my chest.
When I enter a classroom I always go straight for the empty area of the room, (or a corner, or the front row).
I'm afraid of course to sit next to anyone.
I'm afraid I'm going to rob them of their space, inconvenience them, take someone else's place accidentally.
I'm afriad of joining a group. I always let someone drag me into one.
I'm just too timid to ask. And being confronted over that makes me worse.
Its irrational. But I always do it. I need to confront these fears.
I would say it would be more like complex random happenstance. Kinda like a really stupid mouse running through a maze. Universe ran into every dead end on the way to getting to where we are now. And it took a long time to run into all those dead ends.
Things like the complexity of a cell, the beauty of nature, the massive expanse of the universe itself, and how extremely unlikely our planet is to be able to support life the way it does are among reasons why I can't believe it happened at random (also considering entropy and the third law of thermodynamics.)
Regarding Earth itself, I watched shows on Discovery Channel where they explained at length why, to support life, our planet needs to be exactly the size it is; be exactly the distance from our star that we are and have a circular orbit (almost every other viewable system's planets have elliptical orbits); and have the size of moon that we have [which is a quarter the size of our planet (extremely rare; we have not seen this anywhere else)]. It couldn't just be random or luck as the conditions are too perfect and held in balance too well.
We have to have a circular orbit to have stable seasons and temperatures that don't drastically change too much; and we require the size of moon that we have for it to cause gravitational forces which keep our planet's rotation on its axis from wobbling way too much. Our planet also has to have water and not be made entirely of gas.
EDIT: I also understand and appreciate the fact that, when humans create things (especially children), they have a vested interest in them--and how it follows that, since God created us, he therefore cares about us on a personal level.
Things like the complexity of a cell, the beauty of nature, the massive expanse of the universe itself, and how extremely unlikely our planet is to be able to support life the way it does are among reasons why I can't believe it happened at random (also considering entropy and the third law of thermodynamics.)
Regarding Earth itself, I watched shows on Discovery Channel where they explained at length why, to support life, our planet needs to be exactly the size it is; be exactly the distance from our star that we are and have a circular orbit (almost every other viewable system's planets have elliptical orbits); and have the size of moon that we have [which is a quarter the size of our planet (extremely rare; we have not seen this anywhere else)]. It couldn't just be random or luck as the conditions are too perfect and held in balance too well.
We have to have a circular orbit to have stable seasons and temperatures that don't drastically change too much; and we require the size of moon that we have for it to cause gravitational forces which keep our planet's rotation on its axis from wobbling way too much. Our planet also has to have water and not be made entirely of gas.
EDIT: I also understand and appreciate the fact that, when humans create things (especially children), they have a vested interest in them--and how it follows that, since God created us, he therefore cares about us on a personal level.
Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space.
It doesn't seem out of the blue that in the vastness of space there would just so happen to be a single planet that could support life. That said, this also really depends on your definition of "life". Life of a different sort could have arisen in different conditions. Perhaps it already has. We probably won't even recognize it as such, though.
It doesn't seem out of the blue that in the vastness of space there would just so happen to be a single planet that could support life. That said, this also really depends on your definition of "life". Life of a different sort could have arisen in different conditions. Perhaps it already has. We probably won't even recognize it as such, though.
You're not talking about living mattresses, are you?
My mom just came home from the hospital. She had a seizure on Monday at 4 am. She's already battling an autoimmune disease, so it was especially hard on her in her already weakened state. So...yeah, I haven't really been around, and she's going to be needing a lot of help, so I probably still won't be around much.
My mom just came home from the hospital. She had a seizure on Monday at 4 am. She's already battling an autoimmune disease, so it was especially hard on her in her already weakened state. So...yeah, I haven't really been around, and she's going to be needing a lot of help, so I probably still won't be around much.
Comments
Damn cat...
Always goes for the knees.
Sofa is lava these days apparently...
EDIT: Also if I was ever to go gay for a videogame character, it would have to be Francis York Morgan.
Just.. look at him!
He's.... He's....
Perfect!
He seems quite a lot like me, personality wise, though there are some key differences.
What is most interesting though, is that my odd behaviour quirks seem to be related to his, and I may have a Social Anxiety Disorder.
Though I don't seem to display many physical symptoms.
(I have had panic attacks before though. But under very extreme circumstances)
I do display the characteristics assosicated with it.
I don't stutter or anything, but I do worry. (I would worry I cocked things up in that situation, maybe not as bad as that example but the lingering though may be there)
Blushing I have done before, but the "fight-or-flight" symptoms don't kick in as bad as the article describes it.
(Maybe I have more control over it)
Barring that, the article describes me fairly spot-on.
Possibly this could be causing my inability to act lately.
I'm afraid to persue either option, (uni or going it alone) because I am afraid of failure and embarassment.
Hmmm... this might be more serious than I first thought...
EDIT: Look! I'm doing it right now.
Going back and editing posts, because I'm afriad people are going to see this as a wall of text.
GAAAH! Dammit!
cool story bro
Kill your parents tracy...
I think there are 5 seasons, and 3 Star Wars Specials, (unlike the Family Guy ones, (which are well produced and good for a watch or two), they are actually REALLY, REALLY, funny!
Infact, go watch the Star Wars specials. Now!
Which sssssssuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucccckkkkksssssss!!!! >:/
WHOO!
Really sorry to hear that, Johro. A long-term relationship ending is rarely easy, even when you're the instigator and certain that it's no longer working. Probably even more difficult where there are kids involved.
I can't imagine doing long distance for years with no end in sight. You shouldn't feel like the bad guy, a 3-year effort is more than anyone should ask for. In that time a 6 year old kid grows into a 9 year old kid... that is a LOT to miss out on.
Don't feel bad for wanting to have a partner and family you get to see and snuggle every day. No matter how good and devoted you are to each other, there's no way to replace that.
So did the show end before Jack could defeat Aku!? Did evil win!
I'm pretty sure this is what the real deal looks like.
To assume that either the scientific method provides all the answers, or else that any answers not obtainable by same are worthless in knowing are, in my opinion, silly notions to have. Almost as silly as to assume that the universe and everything in it, with their complexity and intricacy, occurred entirely by random happenstance.
I'm an unhappy bunny.
At first she was just saying "oh its nothing, you'll be alright", but once she realised I was being serious she listened.
(And gave me loads of encouragement. Encouragement I was struggling to accept)
The more I talk to people about it, the more I'm convinced I need help in dealing with this.
I need a way to get my thoughts out in the open. For me to actually SAY it, (its so much easier to type stuff since there is little to no fear of reprocussion), instead of keeping all this bottled up.
I think I may just go to the GP and try to get referred to a psychiatrist (the NHS does cover psychiatry, but you have to go through a GP first), to help me deal with this social anxiety before it gets any worse.
(Though me actually doing that is going to be hard. I know I'm going to try to find ways to get myself out of it, to convince myself I don't need to do it, but I HAVE to override that. Thats the exact problem. Fear and Doubt, my mortal nemesis! XD)
I genuinely think now its getting in my way.
I mean a part of me is already reacting over this. Trying to convince myself I'm just being a hypochondriac, that its all a waste of time, but again, thats exactly the problem.
A part of me is trying at all costs to avoid confrontation. The fear of social and personal embarassment.
I've made some progress in dealing with it, but its not enough.
I may have learned to stand up to my brother, but he can still manipulate my fear into getting what he wants, (man that guys is a total asshole! >:/), and I may be able to talk to people in safer environments, like work or in a classroom, but I fear trust, I fear betrayal.
I don't connect to people like I know I can do.
At work, I keep people at arm's length. Nice people too. I worry that they are going to reject me. Hell there are some nerdy people working there, and everytime they talk, I just want to jump in and join their conversation. But I never do.
The words are on the tip of my tongue, but they never escape my mouth.
I fear I'm going to be rude, I fear they are going to be like WTF? and laugh at me. I fear I might get into an argument, or become a target.
You see ^ I have to deal with that every day, with every decision.
Did you know that on my trips to uni, I do two things all the time.
1. I constantly check my stuff to see if I have lost anything, or had something stolen,
(related to past experiences with both)
Like every 10 mins if I'm dozing off.
I doze off. I wake up in shock. I check my bag for my laptop, my pockets for my phone, and my wallet for my bus ticket.
2. When I'm at uni I'm afraid of exposing ANY skin around the waist.
I'm contantly pulling my shirt or jacket down. Checking, and rechecking I've got everything covered.
(I think this is related to past experience as well)
Everytime I got to the loo, I check like 3 or 4 times my fly is done up, and my belt is secure.
(again, related to past experience)
Its irrational fears like this, that are debilitating me.
I should excel at uni, but I'm afriad of trying to do any work, because I fear failure.
I won't decide between uni and work, because either one I fear makes me look like a failure.
(Failing to persue my dreams, failing to take control, failing to fail at uni, worried society will see me as a loser, a failure)
So I never get any work done, on either side, because I'm worried about the other side.
I procrastinate, I go do something else to take my mind of it.
Its irrational, its the source of my lack of focus, and I need help in dealing with that. I realise that now.
Somehow I have to maintain enough control to confront this. I can't back off, and run away. If I do, then how am I ever going to get anywhere in life.
(Struggling to keep my self-loathing from activating now. Damn my mind! Its my worse enemy of all. I know I'm a good person, possibly even a great person. A smart person, but gosh darn it, I can hate myself so much.)
EDIT: Oh yeah another thing I always do.
When going to the bathroom I always avoid the urinal. Go straight for the cubicle.
Even if I have to wait for it, even when I just need a quick wee, even if it stinks I'll go to it.
Oh, and if its taking too long. I just go to another bathroom, even if its on another floor or the other side of a building.
Heh. Lets get another example off my chest.
When I enter a classroom I always go straight for the empty area of the room, (or a corner, or the front row).
I'm afraid of course to sit next to anyone.
I'm afraid I'm going to rob them of their space, inconvenience them, take someone else's place accidentally.
I'm afriad of joining a group. I always let someone drag me into one.
I'm just too timid to ask. And being confronted over that makes me worse.
Its irrational. But I always do it. I need to confront these fears.
Regarding Earth itself, I watched shows on Discovery Channel where they explained at length why, to support life, our planet needs to be exactly the size it is; be exactly the distance from our star that we are and have a circular orbit (almost every other viewable system's planets have elliptical orbits); and have the size of moon that we have [which is a quarter the size of our planet (extremely rare; we have not seen this anywhere else)]. It couldn't just be random or luck as the conditions are too perfect and held in balance too well.
We have to have a circular orbit to have stable seasons and temperatures that don't drastically change too much; and we require the size of moon that we have for it to cause gravitational forces which keep our planet's rotation on its axis from wobbling way too much. Our planet also has to have water and not be made entirely of gas.
EDIT: I also understand and appreciate the fact that, when humans create things (especially children), they have a vested interest in them--and how it follows that, since God created us, he therefore cares about us on a personal level.
Hilarity ensues.
It doesn't seem out of the blue that in the vastness of space there would just so happen to be a single planet that could support life. That said, this also really depends on your definition of "life". Life of a different sort could have arisen in different conditions. Perhaps it already has. We probably won't even recognize it as such, though.
You're not talking about living mattresses, are you?
I don't know if that would be awesome or horrifying. Probably both, especially if they simply act like mattresses to lure in their prey...
It's a mimic!
I mean, over £100 on one of them! O_O
I'm going to be getting mine next month apparently, so I can't wait to figure out how to use it!
(Worse comes to worse, looks like I could sell it for a tidy profit! XD)
You must be well endowed because otherwise I don't know why she would want to put up with your shit. Or vice versa.
Yeah, but where's the plastic. In his wallet or on her? No, that's too far. She seems like a very nice call girl.
In a little bad taste.
Yeah, like posting pictures of call girls on the forum.
Hey! My mother is one of those call girls, you bastard!