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Corrupted Wish

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  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited August 2009
    Granted, but it pays -$1,000/hour.

    I wish I could fast-forward through time to the day my package arrives.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    granted. it's actually a bomb...
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    strobro wrote: »
    granted. it's actually a bomb...

    make a wish
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    Compy 386 wrote: »
    Granted, but the million pounds of candy drops on you from the sky, and every small child in the state swarms the candy, eating your crushed body in the process.

    ew...

    it hates you and is a loud mouth and most of the words that come out of that loud mouth are swears. the bad harsh ones...

    i wish for a legendary pokemon egg...

    that doesn't hate me or eat me in any way or get stolen. by team rocket. or anybody. and it doesn't die... ever... and i don't die... ever... and no one gets jealous... and it doesn't kill anybody unless i tell it to... and this is uncorruptable...
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but it HATCHES into a Shiny Magikarp, that is to evovle into the somewhat legendary Red Gyrados... that does hate you or eats you in any way or gets stolen. by team rocket. or anybody. and it dies... soon after... and you die... soon after... and no one gets jealous, because it sucks so bad... and it doesn't kill anybody except you.
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    ...

    I wish people would remember to make a wish.
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but they then wish your wish away.

    I wish my dog could talk.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but he only talks in newspeak.

    I wish I had exclusively good connections in the video game world, so I can play awesome video games a month before they release.
  • Darkblade07Darkblade07
    edited September 2009
    granted,but your connection breaks, and you get Wand of Gamelon

    I wish that this wish could never go wrong
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but it does nothing.

    I wish I knew a way to cheat the laws of physics (but not cheat them right now- I only want the knowlegde)
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but knowing causes your brain to explode from trying to comprehend the knowledge.

    I wish the new simpsons episodes werent so borring.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted. Now they're mind-numingly lame and unfunny... but not boring.

    I wish I was CEO of Mirosoft instead of Bill Gates.
  • Darkblade07Darkblade07
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but your so lame that your new company slowly colapses

    i wish i could make money appear
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    make a wish!
  • Darkblade07Darkblade07
    edited September 2009
    edit^
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but the money appears in my wallet.

    I wish I could Teleport to anywhere i want.
  • Darkblade07Darkblade07
    edited September 2009
    granted,you teleport to McDonalds and notice that only you teleported...not your clothes

    i wish i could sing
  • priznaprizna
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but you are signed up with a contract, and eventually get so bugged by the paparatzi that you knock one of them out and get sentenced to life in prison because of a new law that was just passed which does not alow paparatsi to be hurt in any way.

    I wish i could get what ever food i want when i want it without leaving my house.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    granted. you sing. badly. VERY badly. VERY badly. VERY badly. VERY badly. you sing so badly the world asplodes. it turns out it's only just your head. somehow...

    i brick i had a red button to push. that splows up the world. which is just your head. and a watermellon. for some reason.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but your wish, when translated from "random nonsense" to "english", really is that you wish you were a brick that's been smashed into tiny bits by a sledgehammer.

    I wish it were.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    0_0

    granted. IT means I, and WERE means WERE SMASHED BY A COW. so your wish was actually this, i wish that i were smashed by a cow.

    i wish for...a cow. in this uncorruptable cow. i mean wish.
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but it appears 300 feet above you, and promptly falls onto and crushes you.

    I wish life wasn't so loud all the time.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    *sigh...* you guys just don't get the meaning of uncorruptable...

    granted. your life is silent. your a mute. you also don't know sign language. so when someone asked if you wanted to be murdered, you couldn't answer. you died.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    I wish strobro made a wish.
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but it was no less stupid then anyone elses.

    (And yes, we know the meaning of uncorruptable, but it goes against the whole point of the thread)

    I wish I had a decent job with decent pay.
  • City Of DelusionCity Of Delusion
    edited September 2009
    Granted. You now clean out sewers for a living.

    I wish Telltale would patch the WiiWare versions of Tales of Monkey Island.
  • FealiksFealiks
    edited September 2009
    Granted but you immediately realise the futility of life and kill yourself

    I wish I could whistle forever without having to breathe in.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but that doesn't stop you from sufficating of oxegen deprivation.

    I wish I couldn't die of anything except age.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    granted. you die of the stress of being 16.

    i wish i did a barrel roll into a pit of lava.
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted fullwise.

    I wish life were like that.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    were like what? you're wish can't be granted. the wish granter (namely me) only heard not sense make.

    i wish cyler would DIE already!
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but he does so by crashing his car into yours, killing the pair of you.

    I wish my hair was more manageable.
  • TookiGuyTookiGuy
    edited September 2009
    Unmanagable hair is a new fad, and now no one likes you.

    I wish humans never existed(me included).
  • Compy 386Compy 386
    edited September 2009
    Granted, unfortunately, that makes your wish nonexistant, and so it's canceled out by logic, but then the you that does exist now wishes again, and the paradox continues until you become aware of this in the past and strangle yourself with your own umbilical cord inside your mom's woumb to prevent yourself from perpetuating the wish, but THAT causes even more paradoxes and creates an even weirder set of paradoxes, until the impossiblilties of all this makes your head asplode.

    I wish that paragraph wasn't so dang long.
  • TookiGuyTookiGuy
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but then you'd probably make even lesser sense, and you'd look like you were full of retard juice.

    I wish I could make humans non-existant without causing any paradoxes.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    granted. but Humans is the name of the wish granter. sorry, but you just destroyed wish making for the rest of eternity.

    i wish your last wish didn't exist.
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but Humans takes offence that he is no longer name-checked and beats you up.

    I wish I didn't have to keep reformatting my PC every other day.
  • strobrostrobro
    edited September 2009
    granted. now you have to reformat it every time you make the smallest movement with your mouse.

    i wish avatars could be a lot bigger.
  • Darth MarsdenDarth Marsden
    edited September 2009
    Granted, but the minimum size is now 1024x800, and the rest of the site is squeezed into a tiny space on the side.

    I wish I didn't have a headache right now.
  • TookiGuyTookiGuy
    edited September 2009
    But then you'd not take your brain's advice and give it rest, and end up going crazy.

    I wish we could "win" in this "Corrupted Wish" game.
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