Ideas for dialouge
Post your ideas for potential dialouge in the game.
Heavy loses to tycho
(Heavy points his finger like a gun at Tycho)
tycho: Oh please threatening me with your invisible gun is not -
Heavy: POW!
(Tycho's head explodes)
Strong Bad: I may be a bit in over my head with this...
Max: Do it again! Do it again!
Edit: A competition to decide on the best suggested dialouge is now in progress. Here's the rules
1. You can nominate up to two snippets.
2. You cannot nominate yourself.
3. the top 5-10 willl be put into a poll and the a winner will be decided by puplic vote.
4. Their is no tangible reward for this contest. It's just a bit of fun. But maybe if Telltale takes notice...
P.S. You can nominate my enteries. Just saying
Heavy loses to tycho
(Heavy points his finger like a gun at Tycho)
tycho: Oh please threatening me with your invisible gun is not -
Heavy: POW!
(Tycho's head explodes)
Strong Bad: I may be a bit in over my head with this...
Max: Do it again! Do it again!
Edit: A competition to decide on the best suggested dialouge is now in progress. Here's the rules
1. You can nominate up to two snippets.
2. You cannot nominate yourself.
3. the top 5-10 willl be put into a poll and the a winner will be decided by puplic vote.
4. Their is no tangible reward for this contest. It's just a bit of fun. But maybe if Telltale takes notice...
P.S. You can nominate my enteries. Just saying
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Comments
Strong Bad: Aw crap! All I got was 2 Skunkapes, a Homsar, a Scout and a lousy Monkey Dude!
Heavy: You may have outsmarted me Rabbit but let's see you outsmart Boolet! (Picks up Sasha)
Max: (Takes out Luger) Oh boy! It's just like my dad's poker games when I was young.
Telltale Games logo
Then some other logos to accompany the Telltale Games logo
Shot of a dark room with an empty table, a light shining on the table. Then Strong Bad takes a seat, followed by Max and Tycho.
STRONG BAD: Let's do this.
Fade to black
TELLTALE GAMES PRESENTS
Shot of heavy furiously putting a rock on the table.
HEAVY: HA! YOU LOSE!
ROCK, PAPER, BACCARAT
Tycho: So, Exactly Who are you?
Heavy: I am Heavy Weapons Guy. But my teammates call me Heavy.
Tycho: They got that right.
Strong Bad: So, Max, what's your favorite game?
Max: I like the one where I pick up random pedestrians and drive recklessly through the city and drop them off at God knows where.
Strong Bad: You mean Taxi Driver? That's a cool video game, man!
Max: Whoa, who said anything about video games?
Tycho: Don't you ever put on clothes, Max?
Max: I'm a wild animal. I'm supposed to be naked. It's expected of me.
Tycho: Is that a no?
Max: Not really.
Heavy: Where does little bunny keep his gun?
Max: That's none of your damn business. And don't call me a bunny!
Heavy: Aw, he's so cute when he's mad.
Max: Grrr...
I was just thinking of opening cutscenes for the diffrent characters:
Max's
Sam and Max are relaxing in the office (I.e. trying to shoot a fly) when...
RRIIINNNGGG!
I got it! I got it!
(Sam shoves max out the window)
Sam: Yeah? Uh'uh? Maybe? It's for you Max.
(Sam hands the phone to Max who's hanging out the window.)
Max: Yes? Right... With a flamethrower... I'm there.
Sam: Who was it? The Comisioner?
Max: Better. I've been invited to an interdimensional poker tournemt!
Sam: Why? You don't have any money.
Max: I don't but there's all that gold in fort knox just going to waste.
Sam: Gambling our nations financial security on games of chance, the greatest American tradition!
Tycho's Opening
(Phone Rings)
Gabe: Hello? Tycho, dude, it's for you.
Tycho: Yes? Yes? Yes? Hell No! Oh, alright. (he hangs up)
Gabe: Who was it?
Tycho: Some dude invited me to a poker tournament.
Gabe: Who's playing?
Tycho: A sociopathic rabbit, a Russian Soldier, and some kind of wrestleman.
Gabe: All right, have fun. You poor bastard.
Tycho: What?
Gabe: Nothing.
Heavy's
Engineer: We just recived order that one of us has to attend a Texas hold 'em poker tornement.
Scout: How 'bout Spy. He plays cards.
Spy: Non! I play Baccharach, not your stupid "Look at me maintain a straight face for 5 hours" game.
Scout: How about the Pyro. He/she/it has an incredible poker face.
Engineer: Don't you remember what happened the last time we tried "Go Fish" with him?
Scout: Oh yeah... got it mixed up with an ouigi board and somehow managed to channel the spirit of Thomas Jefferson.
Engineer: The rest of that night is something that still haunts my dreams.
(Heavy enters)
Heavy: What are you talking about?
Engineer: Poker tornument.
Heavy: Will there be sandviches?
Scout: I guess...
Heavy: COUNT ME IN!
Strong Bad
(ring)
Strong Bad: Hello? Yes? Okay, Count me in.
Strong Sad: Who was it?
Strong Bad: Some idiot invited me to a poker tournament.
Strong Sad: Are you going?
Strong Bad: I don't know. What else is there to do?
Strong Sad: I could read you some of the poetry I've written.
Strong Bad: Okay, I'm going.
To name a few from the speculation thread.
Strong Bad: Yeah?
Tycho: How do you play poker with boxing gloves on?
*strong bad's eyebrows are lowered*
Strong Bad: Max, after this hand, can I borrow your gun?
Max: I wouldn't recommend using it. You don't know where that gun's been.
Strong Bad: Where has it been?
Max: None of your damn buisness.
Strong Bad: No, thank you.
Max: No.
Tycho: No.
Heavy: Hooray, More For ME! Om Nom Nom Nom
Strong bad: So, Max... If you're here, then's where's Sam?
Max: He's at home running the country for me.
Strong Bad: Can you ask Sam if he'll make a law which requires all extremely hot women to be within fifty feet of me and my awesomeness?
Max: That depends on whether or not I win.
Strong Bad: So, where exactly are we?
Tycho: We're at the inventory. This is an exclusive club, where all video game characters either take a break between games, or drown their sorrows when their series end.
Max: He's telling the truth. Me and Sam were regulars here for five years before Telltale gave us our big break. Real Shame about Bernard, though. He was such a nice guy.
(Gabe is sitting on the couch when the Cheat land on his lap)
Tycho: I won us a new pet from a wrestle man.
Gabe: Awsome, maybe this one woun't barf all over the rug.
Div: I heard that!
Tycho: Also, are fully automatic miniguns illegal in this state?
Gabe: I think so..
Tycho: Then Sasha's all yours. Now If you'll excuse me this Luger and I have a date with a certain Mr. Franzibald.
Heavy's victory
Scout: What's all this crap?
Heavy: My winnings from cards last night.
Scout: Can I have this Luger?
Heavy: Sure take it. Is too small anyway.
Scout: What's this squeaky thing?
Heavy: He is my new teddy bear.
(The Cheat gulps)
(Scout picks up FF2000)
Scout: What's this hunk of junk.
Heavy: Not sure.
(A BLU Spy attempts to backstab Heavy but the FF2000 leaps at him.)
(Asorted screams and mechanical whiring)
Heavy: Fruit F[BLEEP]r is credit to team!
(Scout barfs.)
Max: I'm back, sam! I won!
Sam: Sweet Gamblin' Jesus in a rap album! What did you win?
Max: Want a Fully-Automatic MiniGun?
Sam: Aw, Max. You know just what I want.
Max: I also got a new pet. He's specially trained to gnaw faces off.
The Cheat: Meh meh meh mezemeh!
Sam: Aw, he's adorable. And he should be able to help us with our rat problem.
Max: I also got something called an F-F-2000.
Sam: What does it do?
Max: You... don't want to know.
Strong Bad's Victory
Strong Bad: I'm back from the poker game. And I won!
Strong Mad: HOLY CRAP!
Strong Sad: What did you win?
Strong Bad: Let's see.. Fully automatic minigun... I think I'll sell it to Bubs for video game cash. And... a luger... I'll keep that as a "prop" for the next Dangeresque movie. And.. an F-F-2000. I'll give this to Homestar . It's rather... unpleasant.
SB:Holy crap! I won the tournament!
SS:What did you win?
SB:This huge minigun, a Luger, and some watch. You can have it, not my style.
SS: Thanks.
(Gabe comes in, beats SS up and takes watch.)
SB: What...the...crap. That was awesome.
(puts a bound and gaged Homestar on the table)
Max: What does it do?
Strong Bad: Speaks gibberish and prances like amoron all day.
Max: I've beeen looking for a new secretery of sports.
Homestar: (muffled) Yay!
Or:
Strong Bad: Aw crumbs, outta chips. Gonna have to bet this thing then.
(puts homestar on table)
Tycho: What does it do?
Strong Bad: Speaks gibberish and prances like a moron all day.
Tycho: Alright, I need another guy to molest.
Strong Bad: Wait, what?
Tycho: Nothing...
Strong bad:wait that isnt our normal deck of cards.
Heavy:SPY mind reading cards
Max:yeah and your point is.
Fixed it up for you.
Strong Bad: here man try this
*takes out banang*
Max:*Shoots banang out of strong bad's hand*
Tycho:Why would do that?
Max:That's none of your damn buisness.
Sorry, I'm a bit of a grammar nazi.
Also, Heavy's improper grammar is intentional.
Strong Bad: What the crap?
Max: What the hell is that?
Tycho: My Fruit F***er 2000.
Heavy: Keep it away from dealer!
(FF2000 leaps over off screen and attacks Dealer)
Dealer: AAAAAARGH! Get it off! It's killing me! NOOOOOOOO!
Tycho: I always suspected he was a giant fruit.
Strong Bad: They're good, if you like breaking your diaphragm on hockey pucks.
Max: Or communion wafers. Or bottlecaps. Or lug nuts.
Strong Bad: I want my pork rinds!
Tycho: I was promised there would be DONUTS!
Heavy: I require SANDVICHES!
Heavy: Cheating? YOU FILTHY CHEATER!
[Strong Bad] has died. Respawn in 5 . . .
Strong Bad: Aw, crap! Now I wish I had the fingers to do THAT!
AND
Heavy: Hahah! Tiny bunny miss straight! 1, 2, 3, 4, and 4! Haha!
Max: *shoots second 4 card once* And now, 5 dots. 1,2,3,4,5. Straight.
Heavy: EES NOT POSSIBLE! *flips over table*
(Flashback to Strong Bad asleep at the table while Strong Sad, Homestar and Homsar play some sort of Magic: The Gathering game)
Strong Sad: Homestar, your move.
Homestar: I choose: Baltimow Avenue!
Strong Sad: Umm... Homestar I think you've got the game mixed up with Monopoly again.
Homestar: Soooo... Do I get 200 dollews for passing go?
Strong Sad: Why don't you draw a new card from the deck?
(Homestar picks up an obviously hand writen card that sayss "go and bug Marzipan for a while")
Homestar: Wight away!
(Leaves)
Heavy: Job pays very good. After all it costs $400,000 dollars to fire my weapon-
Tycho: For twelve seconds. We heard you the first time. I got my money for taking part in a rather disturbing averisment campain.
(Tycho holds up a poster with him hoding a glass of fruit juice which reads F---- F---er brand smothies: It's F---ing nutrisious)
Max: Where did you get yours SB?
Strong Bad: I, uh, recived it from all the hot celebrities that are totally waiting at mmy place right now.
Tycho: In the same way that Gabe "totally" set up a unicorn farm?
Strong Bad: Shut up! (to himself) and I thought Stong Sad was bad enough.
Caption: Meanwhile...
(Gabe in a field with dozens of unicorns)
Gabe: This rocks.
Max: Asks people for law ideas.
Strong Bad: Asks people what their favorite videogame is.
Tycho: Asks people how they like their job.
Heavy: Asks obvious questions that never get answered.
Heavy: Is not your damn business, puny bunny man.
Max: Oh, I feel you, brother.
Or something, I'm not gonna try and get their personalities right. But I'm actually more curious to where Heavy stores his gun than where Max has his.
i wouldn't think they would go high budget in security (like they probably have strong sad as guard). even if they have a good security i don't think it would do any good. in fact i think they don't have security anymore for insurance reasons.
Max: Touche' Strong Bad. But a lagamorph always has (Lays out 4 aces) 4 ACES UP HIS SLEEVES!!!!!!!
Strong Bad: 4 ACES?!?!?!!? WHAT THE CRAP?!?!!? Where'd you keep 4 aces?!?!
Max: ...From my sleeves.
Strong Bad: you're naked! Where do you keep your sleeves?
Max: ..That...is none of your damn business Strong Bad.
Heavy: Bunny man best stop or I'll be using Sasha.
....Yes, I suck at witty banter
Heavy: I live at Gravelpit. I stand on giant mount outside Red Base and shoot at Blu team until chunks of baby men lie everywhere. What about you?
Tycho: I sit around on my ass and play video games.
Heavy: Yikes! You are dangerous!
Strong Bad: I despise you.
Tycho: I loathe you.
Strong: I abhor you.
Tycho: Uhhhh... DAMN! I can't think of any more.
Strong Bad: Yes! I win! Thank you, hidden thesaurus that I always keep in my pants for some strange reason!
Tycho: Yes I got a flush
Strong Bad: More like a flush down the toilet
Tycho: You're one to talk
Strong Bad: Hey I was trying to turn into a monster
If you don't get the joke look at the sbemail unnatural disasters
This conversation brings to mind a rather interesting point. In the Penny Arcade comic, Tycho plays TF2. As the medic (usually). Hmmm....
I probably shouldn't dwell on this too long or my head will explode.
I find it unlikely that Tycho, with his pretentious vocabulary, would run out of synonyms for "hate" faster than Strong Bad. Tycho would go into longer and longer words, and Strong Bad would have to start making words up.
[/nitpicky fanboy]
Strong bad: read em' and weep boys. pair of abdi's. i mean aces.
Tycho: ha, i got a straight!
Strong bad: *chuckles*
Tycho: whats that supposed to mean?
Strong bad:nothing, nothing. *mumblings*ostriches *more mumbling*
Tycho: Oh, yeah?
Heavy: Yes, I keep it in pocket.
Tycho: You're admitting to bringing extra cards?
Heavy: No, just extra hand. (pulls disembodied hand of Spy out of his pocket) See?
Strong Bad: (grossed out) *urk* Well, there goes my lunch.
Max: (scared) Right hand, did I ever tell you how much I appreciate you?
Tycho: (also grossed out) I wish I had a hat so I could vomit in it.
Intro to Game:
Epic Music.
Heavy walks in holding Sasha.
Max walks in holding Luger.
Strong Bad comes in with Dangeresque Glasses and his Nunchuck Gun.
Tycho walks in holding his FF200.
They all sit at the table.
(pause)
Strong Bad: All right, guys, you've all played the tutorial before, so you know how this works. I better win this time, because there's no quicker way to turn off the hotties than being a terrible poker player man.
(Flash card appears. Name: Strong Bad. Home: Free Country, USA. Most Valuable Item (MVI):The Cheat.)
Max: I'm ready. Flint Paper once told me that bad cards are no reason to get beaten by a buncha humps. (Flash card. Name: Max. Home: New York. MVI: Luger)
Heavy: You will be beaten. Best strategy against Heavy Weapons Guy? Do NOT bet against Heavy Weapons Guy. (Flash card. Name: Heavy. Home: Gravelpit. MVI: Sasha the Minigun.)
Tycho: You better be careful. My first response to an inveterate raiser is to shove chips down their throat until they **** like a slot machine. (Flash Card. Name: Tycho Brahe. Home: Seattle. MVI: Div the Div-X Player)
Strong Bad: Alright, Dealer man. Throw those cards at us.
Max (seductively): Would you like me to be dead?
Tycho: ...The prospect is now vaguely tempting.
Max: I can't help but wonder if I'm the only one who's made to kiss guys in fanfics. Those writers have no idea what Sam's breath is like.
Tycho: I have read descriptions of parts of Gabe I had previously only assumed to exist.
Heavy: WHY WOULD I BE LOVEY-LOVEY WITH MEDIC? HE IS LOUSY KISSER! ...Is what I have been hearing...
Strong Bad (somehow doing a traumatized thousand-mile stare): Senor. Cardgage. There are no words. Oh wait, yes there are. JIBBLIE JIBBLIE JIBBLIE! (teleports rapidly)
(Cut to Sam, in a close-up)
Sam: I wonder what Max is up to. (Zoom out. Sam is defending himself from ninja cats) BACK, foul beasts! BACK, I say!
(Back to table)
Strong Bad: You're not the only one, man. I hope Homestar's okay.
(Cut to Homestar. He is tied up above a tank of water.)
Homestar: Strong Bad? Little Help? I'm still trying to get out of this Houdini-ma-tron. Stro' Bro'?
(Back to table)
Heavy: Ah, How I long to be back at Gravelpit killing the tiny Blu baby men. I wonder how The Team is doing without me.
(Cut to Gravelpit.)
Robo-Heavy: I am Heavy Weapons Guy. This is my weapon.
Scout: You're right, hardhat. It DOES sound like the real thing.
Engineer: I thought so. It better work, though. We've got Company! (Bullets shoot at the team.)
(Cut Back to table)
Tycho: I'm worried about Gabe. Who knows what kind of wierd stuff he does when I'm not there.
(Cut to Gabe)
Gabe: Looks like the coast is clear. (Takes copy of Metroid Other M and puts it in his pants.) Mmmmmm...
(Cut back to table)
Max: Eh, they probably just wait for us to get back.
Strong Bad: Yep. Uh-huh.
Heavy: Agreed.
Tycho. Yeah. That's it.