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What we have learned from Jurassic Park (Just for fun thread)

WARP10CKWARP10CK
edited November 2011 in Jurassic Park
I made a simmiliar thread in the BTTF forums and decided to make one here as well
Anyway here are my picks keep adding them guys

#1 You should always put locking mechanisms on the vehical doors.
#2 If there is a fatass who isn't very nice.... don't allow him admin access.
#3 Dont let the token black guy go to the power hut alone.
#4 Dont climb electric fences. Ever.
#5 Always put shaving cream on someone else's pie.
#6 Wash your hands before you eat anything
#7 Make sure you run it over when you come back down.
#8 Know the magic word.
#9 Dont openly admit you hate kids, because you will get stuck with them the entire time.
#10 Always check the vending machines first for devious people.
#11 If its heavy, its expensive.
#12 When ya gotta go, you gotta go.
#13 Kids get scared.
#14 Never ask "where's the goat?" You will find the goat.
#15 Rippling water = Danger
#16 Chances are, if you were in the jeep before, you'll end up in a jeep again.
#17 Same thing applies to trees.
#18 Climbing down trees is not impossible.
#19 Nobody cares that we got Dodson here.
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Comments

  • synJPsynJP
    edited March 2011
    #20 If you say 'unless they figure out how to open doors', they will.
  • IcedhopeIcedhope
    edited March 2011
    #21 When you gotta go, you gotta go. but shouldn't.
  • SpielbergFanSpielbergFan
    edited March 2011
    #22 Don't ever doubt the mathematics. They are right all the time.
  • robotporobotpo
    edited March 2011
    #23 When swarmy, horny chaoticians ride a T-Rex head through a bathroom wall, when they fly off it will inevitably look like someone is yanking their ass with a wire
  • FPugFPug
    edited March 2011
    #24 When someone tells you to shoot her, you SHOOT HER!
  • AlpharaptorAlpharaptor
    edited March 2011
    #25 A t-rex can see you if you move...so don't do it
  • AlpharaptorAlpharaptor
    edited March 2011
    #26 If you find a raptor in the kitchen, put it in the freezer
  • FPugFPug
    edited March 2011
    #27 If you're gonna steal embryos. Do it with a can of Barbasol.
  • waroftheworlds01waroftheworlds01
    edited March 2011
    #28: Always have a 12 year old girl on hand to help bring the power back online.
  • FPugFPug
    edited March 2011
    #29 Always look both ways before shooting a raptor.
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #30 The perfect example of chaos theory is when someone randomly jumps out of a moving vehicle.
  • vekiveki
    edited March 2011
    #31 Beware of lucky girls.
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #32 It's not the power trying to come back on.
  • EvilDeadFanEvilDeadFan
    edited March 2011
    #33 Hold onto your butt
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #34 Make sure the safety bars on the ride stay put.
  • nanotyranonanotyrano
    edited March 2011
    #35 Never throw a stick at a Dilophosaurus
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #36 Inspections slow everything down.
  • jpark_08jpark_08
    edited March 2011
    #37 Spare no expense
    #38 Don't go into the long grass
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #39 Dinosaurs know how to open doors.
  • TrenchfootTrenchfoot
    edited March 2011
    #40 Be an astronaut.
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited March 2011
    #41 If you stand really still.... the T-rex will start to question its life. Wondering why you are not afraid of him and running away, he will then get seriously depressed and lose its appetite.... but the second you run he gets all pumped up like a T-rex king and eats you while you are on the toilet.

    (that was actually my facebook update from June 20, 2010 at 5:43pm)
  • nagasadownagasadow
    edited March 2011
    #42 If you're 40+ ugly as sin and want to act tough wear the shortest short shorts money can buy sparing no expense and that they must hold onto your butt very tightly and hold king Kong in your frontal region. Also they must be made out of a khaki material.

    #43 When you are an black man and getting your arm ripped off by raptors the skin turns white for your arm

    #44 Fat people have butter fingers

    #45 Turning the wheel very fast does not slow you down

    #46 Lawyers in the end always get what they deserve. Dishing out shit and getting eaten up for it

    #47 (from jp3) Good intentions always lead to the worst possible outcomes

    #48 just because you spared no expense doesn't mean that one big pile of shit wont hit the fan

    #49 When talking seriously Sam Neil looks like a chimp

    #50 If you happen to be in a dinosaur movie rocking a mustache then in the video game tie in released 18 years later you will be 15 years younger and missing that mustache :D

    #51 Don't flash a flashlight at a t rex and point it up at a glass ceiling thinking it won't break it
  • synJPsynJP
    edited March 2011
    #52 A cell phone can survive inside spinosaurus guts
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #53 This is a game trail; carnivores hunt on game trails.
  • MasCotMasCot
    edited March 2011
    #54 Life finds a way.
  • The GentlemanThe Gentleman
    edited March 2011
    #55 Don't make mommy very angry.
  • vekiveki
    edited March 2011
    #56 Spare no expense, but give total control of the state of art security system to one greedy fat bastard
    #57 If that fat bastard doesn't mess with raptors, you definitely should
  • FPugFPug
    edited March 2011
    #58 Mr.DNA comes from your blood.
  • vekiveki
    edited March 2011
    #59 Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.
  • WatsamaxWatsamax
    edited March 2011
    #60 When they say spit, They mean your gum.
  • synJPsynJP
    edited March 2011
    #61 You go up and you hide...high
  • FPugFPug
    edited March 2011
    #62 Mathematicians never keep their word.
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited March 2011
    #63 Violence and technology, not good bedfellows
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #64 Each mosquito only goes after one species of dinosaur, and ONLY ONE DINOSAUR
  • waroftheworlds01waroftheworlds01
    edited March 2011
    #65 Don't park your Trailers next to a huge cliff.
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #66 When the power tries to come back on, it could sound like a T-Rex.
  • EvilDeadFanEvilDeadFan
    edited March 2011
    #40 Show some respect towards raptors.
  • Martin McFlyMartin McFly
    edited March 2011
    #68? To cope with the shock that they have a T.Rex, put your head between your knees
  • IrishmileIrishmile
    edited March 2011
    #69 Ice Cream is best enjoyed when people are out there dying
  • robotporobotpo
    edited March 2011
    Irishmile wrote: »
    #69 Ice Cream is best enjoyed when people are out there dying

    # 70 One blood-sucking lawyer counts as "people" to well-intentioned but ethically-challenged old Scottish men and scantily clad female paleobotanists
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